Half the cookbooks tell you how to cook the food and the other half tell you how to avoid eating it.
ANDY ROONEYI’ve learned, That simple walks with my father around the block on summer nights when I was a child did wonders for me as an adult.
More Andy Rooney Quotes
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Vegetarian – that’s an old Indian word meaning lousy hunter.
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I dislike loud-mouthed patriots who suggest they like our country more than I do. Some people’s idea of patriotism is hating other countries.
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Would a real man get caught eating a twinkie?
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I’ve learned, That you should never say no to a gift from a child.
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Happiness depends more on how life strikes you than on what happens.
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Most of us believe everyone has a right to his own opinion – as long as it agrees with ours.
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No one ever writes a book in which he is the bad guy.
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I’ve learned That opportunities are never lost; someone will take the ones you miss.
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I’ve learned, That the easiest way for me to grow as a person is to surround myself with people smarter than I am.
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I’ve learned, That love, not time, heals all wounds.
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Don’t rule out working with your hands. It does not preclude using your head.
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The great virtue of being alone is that your mind can go its own way.
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A woman over 30 will never wake you in the middle of the night to ask, “What are you thinking?”. She doesn’t care what you think.
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The average dog is a nicer person than the average person.
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You can’t be a good writer without being a good thinker.
ANDY ROONEY