I’ve learned that no one is perfect until you fall in love with them.
ANDY ROONEYI’ve learned, That simple walks with my father around the block on summer nights when I was a child did wonders for me as an adult.
More Andy Rooney Quotes
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If you get murdered because you go on a date with someone you met on the Internet, you probably deserved it.
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Guns do not make you a killer. I think killing makes you a killer. You can kill someone with a baseball bat or a car, but no one is trying to ban you from driving to the ball game.
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It’s paradoxical, that the idea of living a long life appeals to everyone, but the idea of getting old doesn’t appeal to anyone.
ANDY ROONEY -
Conservatives are more religious than liberals–although there is no evidence that they’re nicer people because of it.
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The third rule of life is this: Everything you buy today is smaller, more expensive, and not as good as it was yesterday.
ANDY ROONEY -
The fastest thing computers do is go obsolete.
ANDY ROONEY -
Christians talk as though goodness was their idea but good behavior doesn’t have any religious origin. Our prisons are filled with the devout.
ANDY ROONEY -
I’ve learned, That love, not time, heals all wounds.
ANDY ROONEY -
Never trust the food in a restaurant on top of the tallest building in town that spends a lot of time folding napkins.
ANDY ROONEY -
Don’t rule out working with your hands. It does not preclude using your head.
ANDY ROONEY -
It would be a better world if everyone in it knew all the truth about everything.
ANDY ROONEY -
I’ve learned that under everyone’s hard shell is someone who wants to be appreciated and loved.
ANDY ROONEY -
Anyone who watches golf on television would enjoy watching the grass grow on the greens.
ANDY ROONEY -
Don’t take a butcher’s advice on how to cook meat. If he knew, he’d be a chef.
ANDY ROONEY -
Most of us believe everyone has a right to his own opinion – as long as it agrees with ours.
ANDY ROONEY