black
grey
blue
red
brown
white

It would be a better world if everyone in it knew all the truth about everything.

Andy Rooney

I don’t know anything offhand that mystifies Americans more than the cotton they put in pill bottles. Why do they do it? Are you supposed to put the cotton back in once you’ve taken a pill out?
ANDY ROONEY

Hands Mystery Pill Yourself
Civilization means conforming to a standard of behavior that may not seem natural to us.
ANDY ROONEY

Behavior Civilization Confirm Natural
Do I have opinions that might piss people off? Yes – that’s what I’m here for.
ANDY ROONEY

Myself Opinion People
I’ve learned, That simple walks with my father around the block on summer nights when I was a child did wonders for me as an adult.
ANDY ROONEY

Adult Block Children Father Simple Summer Walk Wonder
All economists should be locked up until they admit that they don’t know what they’re talking about.
ANDY ROONEY

Admit Economist Talk
You can’t be a good writer without being a good thinker.
ANDY ROONEY

Goodness Poet Thinking Writer Yourself
Sooner or later the world will have to return to the good old days when we fought wars and killed people the old-fashioned way, one at a time.
ANDY ROONEY

Goodness Kill Old Oneself People Return Time World
I’ve learned That opportunities are never lost; someone will take the ones you miss.
ANDY ROONEY

Learning Lost Missing Opportunity Position Yourself
I don’t like food that’s too carefully arranged; it makes me think that the chef is spending too much time arranging and not enough time cooking. If I wanted a picture I’d buy a painting.
ANDY ROONEY

Arrangement Care Food Myself Paint Photograph Time
The third rule of life is this: Everything you buy today is smaller, more expensive, and not as good as it was yesterday.
ANDY ROONEY

Expensive Goodness Rule Small Yourself
Anyone who watches golf on television would enjoy watching the grass grow on the greens.
ANDY ROONEY

Enjoyment Growth Television Watch
I’ve learned, That the less time I have to work with, the more things I get done.
ANDY ROONEY

Learning Myself Time Work
Half the cookbooks tell you how to cook the food and the other half tell you how to avoid eating it.
ANDY ROONEY

Avoid Cook Eat Food Yourself
Always keep your words soft and sweet, just in case you have to eat them.
ANDY ROONEY

Eat Soft Sweet Word Yourself
If you get murdered because you go on a date with someone you met on the Internet, you probably deserved it.
ANDY ROONEY

Date Deserve Internet Meet Murder Yourself
People will generally accept facts as truth only if the facts agree with what they already believe.
ANDY ROONEY

Acceptance Believe Fact General People Truth
Most of us end up with no more than five or six people who remember us. Teachers have thousands of people who remember them for the rest of their lives.
ANDY ROONEY

End Live People Remember Teacher
Christians talk as though goodness was their idea but good behavior doesn’t have any religious origin. Our prisons are filled with the devout.
ANDY ROONEY

Goodness Ideas Ourselves Prison Religious
The best classroom in the world is at the feet of an elderly person.
ANDY ROONEY

Class Person Room World
One of the sweetest things in life: a letter from a friend.
ANDY ROONEY

Friendship Letter Life Oneself Sweet
Those of us who don’t have a party affiliation ought to be able to register under the heading “Confused.
ANDY ROONEY

Confusion Heading Party Register
If you smile when no one else is around, you really mean it.
ANDY ROONEY

Alone Happiness Smile Yourself
My most serious character flaw is that I don’t deny myself much.
ANDY ROONEY

Character Flaw Myself Serious
It isn’t working that’s so hard, it’s getting ready to work.
ANDY ROONEY

Hard Myself Ready Work
I’ve learned, That when your newly born grandchild holds your little finger in his little fist, that you’re hooked for life.
ANDY ROONEY

Born Fingers Hold Life Yourself
Familiar things are a comfort to us all.
ANDY ROONEY

Calm Comfortable Peace
Computers make it easier to do a lot of things, but most of the things they make it easier to do don’t need to be done.
ANDY ROONEY

Computer Easy Need Work

It would be a better world if everyone in it knew all the truth about everything.

Related Topics

Popular Authors

It would be a better world if everyone in it knew all the truth about everything.

Related Topics

Popular Authors

More Andy Rooney Quotes