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I’ve learned that life is like a roll of toilet paper. The closer it gets to the end, the faster it goes.

Andy Rooney

In the futile attempts we all make to tidy up our lives and our surroundings, nothing is more difficult than throwing out a book.
ANDY ROONEY

Book Difficult Live Surround
Familiar things are a comfort to us all.
ANDY ROONEY

Calm Comfortable Peace
Vegetarian – that’s an old Indian word meaning lousy hunter.
ANDY ROONEY

Hunter Old Word
Guns do not make you a killer. I think killing makes you a killer. You can kill someone with a baseball bat or a car, but no one is trying to ban you from driving to the ball game.
ANDY ROONEY

Drive Game Kill Thinking Yourself
The fastest thing computers do is go obsolete.
ANDY ROONEY

Computer Fast Technology
I’ve learned, That when you harbor bitterness, happiness will dock elsewhere.
ANDY ROONEY

Bitter Happiness Learning Myself
You can’t be a good writer without being a good thinker.
ANDY ROONEY

Goodness Poet Thinking Writer Yourself
I’ve learned, That you should never say no to a gift from a child.
ANDY ROONEY

Children Gift Learning Myself
Would a real man get caught eating a twinkie?
ANDY ROONEY

Eat Food Man Reality
I’ve learned, That when you’re in love, it shows.
ANDY ROONEY

Learning Love Show Yourself
The best classroom in the world is at the feet of an elderly person.
ANDY ROONEY

Class Person Room World
All of us talk faster than we listen.
ANDY ROONEY

Fast Listening Ourselves Talk
I’ve learned, That when your newly born grandchild holds your little finger in his little fist, that you’re hooked for life.
ANDY ROONEY

Born Fingers Hold Life Yourself
Half the cookbooks tell you how to cook the food and the other half tell you how to avoid eating it.
ANDY ROONEY

Avoid Cook Eat Food Yourself
Being kind is more important than being right.
ANDY ROONEY

Important Kind Right
It isn’t working that’s so hard, it’s getting ready to work.
ANDY ROONEY

Hard Myself Ready Work

I’ve learned that life is like a roll of toilet paper. The closer it gets to the end, the faster it goes.

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I’ve learned that life is like a roll of toilet paper. The closer it gets to the end, the faster it goes.

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Popular Authors

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