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I’ve learned, That it’s those small daily happenings that make life so spectacular.

Andy Rooney

I’d be more willing to accept religion, even if I didn’t believe it, if I thought it made people nicer to each other but I don’t think it does.
ANDY ROONEY

Acceptance Believe Myself People Religion Thinking Willing
Vegetarian – that’s an old Indian word meaning lousy hunter.
ANDY ROONEY

Hunter Old Word
Don’t keep saying, “I don’t know where the time goes.” It goes the same place it’s always gone and no one has ever known where that is.
ANDY ROONEY

Place Time Unknown
No one ever writes a book in which he is the bad guy.
ANDY ROONEY

Bad Book Guy Oneself Writing
I’ve learned, That one should keep his words both soft and tender, because tomorrow he may have to eat them.
ANDY ROONEY

Eat Learning Myself Word
One of the sweetest things in life: a letter from a friend.
ANDY ROONEY

Friendship Letter Life Oneself Sweet
We need people who can actually do things. We have too many bosses and too few workers.
ANDY ROONEY

Boss Need People Work
Don’t rule out working with your hands. It does not preclude using your head.
ANDY ROONEY

Hands Head Rule World Yourself
If, on the other hand, happiness depends on a good breakfast, flowers in the yard, a drink or a nap, then we are more likely to live with quite a bit of happiness.
ANDY ROONEY

Drink Goodness Hands Happiness Live Quite
The 50-50-90 rule: Anytime you have a 50-50 chance of getting something right, there’s a 90% probability you’ll get it wrong.
ANDY ROONEY

Chance Probability Time Wrong Yourself
I’ve learned, That the less time I have to work with, the more things I get done.
ANDY ROONEY

Learning Myself Time Work
I’ve learned that no matter how serious your life requires you to be, everyone needs a friend to act goofy with.
ANDY ROONEY

Act Friendship Learning Life Myself Requirement Serious
Conservatives are more religious than liberals–although there is no evidence that they’re nicer people because of it.
ANDY ROONEY

Conservatism Liberal Nice People Religious
Sooner or later the world will have to return to the good old days when we fought wars and killed people the old-fashioned way, one at a time.
ANDY ROONEY

Goodness Kill Old Oneself People Return Time World
Don’t take a butcher’s advice on how to cook meat. If he knew, he’d be a chef.
ANDY ROONEY

Advice Cook Himself Meat
I’ve learned that we should be glad God doesn’t give us everything we ask for.
ANDY ROONEY

God Happiness Learning Myself

I’ve learned, That it’s those small daily happenings that make life so spectacular.

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I’ve learned, That it’s those small daily happenings that make life so spectacular.

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