“The average dog is a nicer person than the average person.”

Don’t you hate it when, your suitcase is the last one off the airplane?

If you smile when no one else is around, you really mean it.

If I’d known how many problems I was going to run into before I finished, I can’t remember a single project I would have started.

A woman over 30 will never wake you in the middle of the night to ask, “What are you thinking?”. She doesn’t care what you think.

Vegetarian – that’s an old Indian word meaning lousy hunter.

People will generally accept facts as truth only if the facts agree with what they already believe.

Nothing in fine print is ever good news.

Always keep your words soft and sweet, just in case you have to eat them.

We need people who can actually do things. We have too many bosses and too few workers.

Most of us believe everyone has a right to his own opinion – as long as it agrees with ours.

Don’t take a butcher’s advice on how to cook meat. If he knew, he’d be a chef.

I’ve learned, That the easiest way for me to grow as a person is to surround myself with people smarter than I am.

Most of us aren’t that interested in getting rich- we just don’t want to get poor.

I had one typewriter for 50 years, but I have bought seven computers in six years. I suppose that’s why Bill Gates is rich, and Underwood is out of business.

Elephants and grandchildren never forget.

The great virtue of being alone is that your mind can go its own way.

There can be no doubt that the average man blames much more than he praises. His instinct is to blame. If he is satisfied he says nothing; if he is not, he most illogically kicks up a row.

People residing within the cult of average don’t like to see others rise. It threatens their security, and spotlights their low self-worth. Go for great, no matter what they say.

It takes character to sit there with all that cash and do nothing. I didn’t get to where I am by going after mediocre opportunities.

The average call me obsessed, the successful call me for advice.

Average is a failing plan! Average doesn’t work in any area of life. Anything that you give only average amounts of attention to will start to subside and will eventually cease to exist.

First of all, I’m no better than the next person.

Critics only speak up when they see someone shining. Average work doesn’t threaten them.

Until our mission becomes our obsession, we’ll be chained to the realm of average.