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I’ve learned that we should be glad God doesn’t give us everything we ask for.

Andy Rooney

People will generally accept facts as truth only if the facts agree with what they already believe.
ANDY ROONEY

Acceptance Believe Fact General People Truth
Always keep your words soft and sweet, just in case you have to eat them.
ANDY ROONEY

Eat Soft Sweet Word Yourself
I’ve learned that no matter how serious your life requires you to be, everyone needs a friend to act goofy with.
ANDY ROONEY

Act Friendship Learning Life Myself Requirement Serious
Would a real man get caught eating a twinkie?
ANDY ROONEY

Eat Food Man Reality
A cat’s idea of a ‘good time’ is to kill something.
ANDY ROONEY

Cat Goodness Ideas Kill Time
One of the sweetest things in life: a letter from a friend.
ANDY ROONEY

Friendship Letter Life Oneself Sweet
It’s paradoxical, that the idea of living a long life appeals to everyone, but the idea of getting old doesn’t appeal to anyone.
ANDY ROONEY

Age Ideas Irony Life Live Old
The biggest seller is cookbooks and the second is diet books – how not to eat what you’ve just learned how to cook.
ANDY ROONEY

Avoid Book Cook Learning
Go to bed. Whatever you’re staying up late for isn’t worth it.
ANDY ROONEY

Bed Later Stay Worth
When those waiters ask me if I want some fresh ground pepper, I ask if they have any aged pepper.
ANDY ROONEY

Age Fresh Myself Wait
Half the cookbooks tell you how to cook the food and the other half tell you how to avoid eating it.
ANDY ROONEY

Avoid Cook Eat Food Yourself
When it comes to educating all of us about the most basic things in life, it seems to me we need more kindergartens and fewer graduate schools.
ANDY ROONEY

Basic Education Life Myself Need
Guns do not make you a killer. I think killing makes you a killer. You can kill someone with a baseball bat or a car, but no one is trying to ban you from driving to the ball game.
ANDY ROONEY

Drive Game Kill Thinking Yourself
You can’t be a good writer without being a good thinker.
ANDY ROONEY

Goodness Poet Thinking Writer Yourself
I’ve learned, That love, not time, heals all wounds.
ANDY ROONEY

Healing Love Myself Time Wound
Don’t rule out working with your hands. It does not preclude using your head.
ANDY ROONEY

Hands Head Rule World Yourself

I’ve learned that we should be glad God doesn’t give us everything we ask for.

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I’ve learned that we should be glad God doesn’t give us everything we ask for.

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