Anyone should be very suspicious of a sentence he’s written that can’t be read aloud easily.
ANDY ROONEYI’ve learned, That the less time I have to work with, the more things I get done.
More Andy Rooney Quotes
-
-
I just wish this social institution [religion] wasnt based on what appears to me to be a monumental hoax built on an accumulation of customs and myths directed toward proving something that isnt true.
ANDY ROONEY -
Civilization means conforming to a standard of behavior that may not seem natural to us.
ANDY ROONEY -
I’ve learned, That the less time I have to work with, the more things I get done.
ANDY ROONEY -
I’ve learned… that just one person saying to me, ‘You’ve made my day!’ makes my day.
ANDY ROONEY -
I’ve learned, That when your newly born grandchild holds your little finger in his little fist, that you’re hooked for life.
ANDY ROONEY -
The average dog is a nicer person than the average person.
ANDY ROONEY -
Sooner or later the world will have to return to the good old days when we fought wars and killed people the old-fashioned way, one at a time.
ANDY ROONEY -
Never trust the food in a restaurant on top of the tallest building in town that spends a lot of time folding napkins.
ANDY ROONEY -
I don’t know anything offhand that mystifies Americans more than the cotton they put in pill bottles. Why do they do it? Are you supposed to put the cotton back in once you’ve taken a pill out?
ANDY ROONEY -
Don’t keep saying, “I don’t know where the time goes.” It goes the same place it’s always gone and no one has ever known where that is.
ANDY ROONEY -
I’ve learned, That love, not time, heals all wounds.
ANDY ROONEY -
Guns do not make you a killer. I think killing makes you a killer. You can kill someone with a baseball bat or a car, but no one is trying to ban you from driving to the ball game.
ANDY ROONEY -
All economists should be locked up until they admit that they don’t know what they’re talking about.
ANDY ROONEY -
A cat’s idea of a ‘good time’ is to kill something.
ANDY ROONEY -
I’ve learned, That the easiest way for me to grow as a person is to surround myself with people smarter than I am.
ANDY ROONEY







