Corporation: An ingenious device for obtaining profit without individual responsibility.
AMBROSE BIERCEEducation, n.: That which discloses to the wise and disguises from the foolish their lack of understanding.
More Ambrose Bierce Quotes
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Responsibility, n. A detachable burden easily shifted to the shoulders of God, Fate, Fortune, Luck or one’s neighbor. In the days of astrology it was customary to unload it upon a star.
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Abstainer: a weak person who yields to the temptation of denying himself a pleasure.
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Death is not the end. There remains the litigation over the estate.
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Speak when you are angry and you will make the best speech you will ever regret.
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Mayonnaise: One of the sauces which serve the French in place of a state religion.
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RATIONAL, adj. Devoid of all delusions save those of observation, experience and reflection.
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Forgetfulness – a gift of God bestowed upon debtors in compensation for their destitution of conscience.
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Litigation: A machine which you go into as a pig and come out of as a sausage.
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Quotation, n: The act of repeating erroneously the words of another.
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Optimist – A proponent of the doctrine that black is white.
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Logic: The art of thinking and reasoning in strict accordance with the limitations and incapacities of the human misunderstanding.
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Distance, n. The only thing that the rich are willing for the poor to call theirs and keep.
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Mausoleum, n: the final and funniest folly of the rich.
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Saint: A dead sinner revised and edited.
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Present, n. That part of eternity dividing the domain of disappointment from the realm of hope.
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