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MIND, n. A mysterious form of matter secreted by the brain. Its chief activity consists in the endeavour to ascertain its own nature, the futility of the attempt being due to the fact that it has nothing but itself to know itself with.

Ambrose Bierce

Electricity is the power that causes all natural phenomena not known to be caused by something else
AMBROSE BIERCE

Electricity Natural Reason
Philosophy: A route of many roads leading from nowhere to nothing.
AMBROSE BIERCE

Leadership Philosophy Road
In our civilization, and under our republican form of government, intelligence is so highly honored that it is rewarded by exemption from the cares of office.
AMBROSE BIERCE

Care Civilization Government Intelligence Ourselves Reward
They say that hens do cackle loudest when there is nothing vital in the eggs they have laid.
AMBROSE BIERCE

Animal Born Egg Loud Lying
Edible, adj.: Good to eat, and wholesome to digest, as a worm to a toad, a toad to a snake, a snake to a pig, a pig to a man, and a man to a worm.
AMBROSE BIERCE

Animal Digest Eat Goodness Man Science
Religion. A daughter of Hope and Fear, explaining to Ignorance the nature of the Unknowable.
AMBROSE BIERCE

Fear Hope Ignorance Known Religion
Don’t steal; thou’lt never thus compete successfully in business. Cheat.
AMBROSE BIERCE

Business Cheating Complete Steal Success
Mausoleum, n: the final and funniest folly of the rich.
AMBROSE BIERCE

Final Funny Rich
All are lunatics, but he who can analyze his delusions is called a philosopher.
AMBROSE BIERCE

Analysis Delusion Himself Philosophy
What is a democrat? One who believes that the republicans have ruined the country. What is a republican? One who believes that the democrats would ruin the country.
AMBROSE BIERCE

Believe Country Democracy Oneself Ruin
Speak when you are angry and you will make the best speech you will ever regret.
AMBROSE BIERCE

Angry Best Regret Talk Yourself
Politics: A strife of interests masquerading as a contest of principles. The conduct of public affairs for private advantage.
AMBROSE BIERCE

Advantage Affair Interest Principle Private
Money. A blessing that is of no advantage to us excepting when we part with it.
AMBROSE BIERCE

Blessing Exception Leaving Money
A wedding is a ceremony at which two persons undertake to become one, one undertakes to become nothing, and nothing undertakes to become supportable.
AMBROSE BIERCE

Marriage People Person Support
Sweater, n.: garment worn by child when its mother is feeling chilly.
AMBROSE BIERCE

Children Cold Compassionate Feeling Love Mom
History is an account, mostly false, of events, mostly unimportant, which are brought about by rulers, mostly knaves, and soldiers, mostly fools.
AMBROSE BIERCE

Fake Fools History Important Rule

MIND, n. A mysterious form of matter secreted by the brain. Its chief activity consists in the endeavour to ascertain its own nature, the futility of the attempt being due to the fact that it has nothing but itself to know itself with.

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MIND, n. A mysterious form of matter secreted by the brain. Its chief activity consists in the endeavour to ascertain its own nature, the futility of the attempt being due to the fact that it has nothing but itself to know itself with.

Related Topics

Popular Authors

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