Year: A period of three hundred and sixty-five disappointments.
AMBROSE BIERCEDon’t steal; thou’lt never thus compete successfully in business. Cheat.
More Ambrose Bierce Quotes
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A person who doubts himself is like a man who would enlist in the ranks of his enemies and bear arms agains himself. He makes his failure certain by himself being the first person to be convinced of it.
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Labor is one of the processes by which A acquires property for B.
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Life – a spiritual pickle preserving the body from decay.
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IMAGINATION, n. A warehouse of facts, with poet and liar in joint ownership.
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Present, n. That part of eternity dividing the domain of disappointment from the realm of hope.
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In our civilization, and under our republican form of government, intelligence is so highly honored that it is rewarded by exemption from the cares of office.
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The only distinction that democracies reward is a high degree of conformity.
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RUMOR, n. A favorite weapon of the assassins of character.
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What is a democrat? One who believes that the republicans have ruined the country. What is a republican? One who believes that the democrats would ruin the country.
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Christian, n.: one who believes that the New Testament is a divinely inspired book admirably suited to the spiritual needs of his neighbor.
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Knowledge is the small part of ignorance that we arrange and classify.
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Conversation, n.: A vocal competition in which the one who is catching his breath is called the listener.
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Death is not the end. There remains the litigation over the estate.
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LAWYER, n. One skilled in circumvention of the law.
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Belladonna, n.: In Italian a beautiful lady; in English a deadly poison. A striking example of the essential identity of the two tongues.
AMBROSE BIERCE