RATIONAL, adj. Devoid of all delusions save those of observation, experience and reflection.
AMBROSE BIERCEDon’t steal; thou’lt never thus compete successfully in business. Cheat.
More Ambrose Bierce Quotes
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Absurdity, n.: A statement or belief manifestly inconsistent with one’s own opinion.
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There are two instruments worse than a clarinet – two clarinets.
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Lottery: A tax on people who are bad at math.
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Patriotism. Combustible rubbish ready to the torch of any one ambitious to illuminate his name.
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Democracy is defended in 3 stages. Ballot Box, Jury Box, Cartridge Box.
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Marriage, n: the state or condition of a community consisting of a master, a mistress, and two slaves, making in all, two.
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The partisan strife in which the people of the country are permitted to periodically engage does not tend to the development of ugly traits of character, but merely discloses those that preexist.
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PITY, n. A failing sense of exemption, inspired by contrast.
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To the eye of failure success is an accident.
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War is God’s way of teaching Americans geography.
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RUMOR, n. A favorite weapon of the assassins of character.
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Brain: an apparatus with which we think we think.
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Laughter, n. An interior convulsion, producing a distortion of the features and accompanied by inarticulate noises. It is infectious and, though intermittent, incurable.
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Divorce: a resumption of diplomatic relations and rectification of boundaries.
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Debt, n. An ingenious substitute for the chain and whip of the slavedriver.
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