The hardest tumble a man can make is to fall over his own bluff.
AMBROSE BIERCEWhat is a democrat? One who believes that the republicans have ruined the country. What is a republican? One who believes that the democrats would ruin the country.
More Ambrose Bierce Quotes
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Mausoleum, n: the final and funniest folly of the rich.
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The only distinction that democracies reward is a high degree of conformity.
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In our civilization, and under our republican form of government, intelligence is so highly honored that it is rewarded by exemption from the cares of office.
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RUMOR, n. A favorite weapon of the assassins of character.
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PAIN, n. An uncomfortable frame of mind that may have a physical basis in something that is being done to the body, or may be purely mental, caused by the good fortune of another.
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RATIONAL, adj. Devoid of all delusions save those of observation, experience and reflection.
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Brain: an apparatus with which we think we think.
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Edible, adj.: Good to eat, and wholesome to digest, as a worm to a toad, a toad to a snake, a snake to a pig, a pig to a man, and a man to a worm.
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Eulogy. Praise of a person who has either the advantages of wealth and power, or the consideration to be dead.
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War is God’s way of teaching Americans geography.
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Democracy is four wolves and a lamb voting on what to have for lunch.
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Logic: The art of thinking and reasoning in strict accordance with the limitations and incapacities of the human misunderstanding.
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Opposition, n. In politics the party that prevents the government from running amuck by hamstringing it.
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Distance, n. The only thing that the rich are willing for the poor to call theirs and keep.
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Patience, n. A minor form of dispair, disguised as a virtue.
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