Absurdity, n.: A statement or belief manifestly inconsistent with one’s own opinion.
AMBROSE BIERCEQuotation, n: The act of repeating erroneously the words of another.
More Ambrose Bierce Quotes
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Litigation: A machine which you go into as a pig and come out of as a sausage.
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Death is not the end. There remains the litigation over the estate.
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A person who doubts himself is like a man who would enlist in the ranks of his enemies and bear arms agains himself. He makes his failure certain by himself being the first person to be convinced of it.
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Democracy is four wolves and a lamb voting on what to have for lunch.
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Coward: One who, in a perilous emergency, thinks with his legs.
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Love: A temporary insanity curable by marriage.
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Abstainer: a weak person who yields to the temptation of denying himself a pleasure.
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Aborigines, n.: Persons of little worth found cumbering the soil of a newly discovered country. They soon cease to cumber; they fertilize.
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In our civilization, and under our republican form of government, intelligence is so highly honored that it is rewarded by exemption from the cares of office.
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The only distinction that democracies reward is a high degree of conformity.
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Ambition. An overmastering desire to be vilified by enemies while living and made ridiculous by friends when dead.
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Knowledge is the small part of ignorance that we arrange and classify.
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Lottery: A tax on people who are bad at math.
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REFLECTION,n: An Action of the mind whereby we obtain a clearer view of our relation to the things of yesterday and are able to avoid the perils that we shall not again encounter.
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MYTHOLOGY, n. The body of a primitive people’s beliefs concerning its origin, early history, heroes, deities and so forth, as distinguished from the true accounts which it invents later.
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