Edible, adj.: Good to eat, and wholesome to digest, as a worm to a toad, a toad to a snake, a snake to a pig, a pig to a man, and a man to a worm.
AMBROSE BIERCESpeak when you are angry and you will make the best speech you will ever regret.
More Ambrose Bierce Quotes
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Scriptures – The sacred books of our holy religion, as distinguished from the false and profane writings on which all other faiths are based.
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A wedding is a ceremony at which two persons undertake to become one, one undertakes to become nothing, and nothing undertakes to become supportable.
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ARMOR, n. The kind of clothing worn by a man whose tailor is a blacksmith.
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Eulogy. Praise of a person who has either the advantages of wealth and power, or the consideration to be dead.
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The partisan strife in which the people of the country are permitted to periodically engage does not tend to the development of ugly traits of character, but merely discloses those that preexist.
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Christian, n.: one who believes that the New Testament is a divinely inspired book admirably suited to the spiritual needs of his neighbor.
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Ocean: A body of water occupying about two-thirds of a world made for man – who has no gills.
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Fear has no brains; it is an idiot.
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Aborigines, n.: Persons of little worth found cumbering the soil of a newly discovered country. They soon cease to cumber; they fertilize.
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PAIN, n. An uncomfortable frame of mind that may have a physical basis in something that is being done to the body, or may be purely mental, caused by the good fortune of another.
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The covers of this book are too far apart.
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REALISM, n. The art of depicting nature as it is seem by toads. The charm suffusing a landscape painted by a mole, or a story written by a measuring-worm.
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Riot – A popular entertainment given to the military by innocent bystanders.
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Death is not the end. There remains the litigation over the estate.
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Coward: One who, in a perilous emergency, thinks with his legs.
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