Philosophy: A route of many roads leading from nowhere to nothing.
AMBROSE BIERCEEdible, adj.: Good to eat, and wholesome to digest, as a worm to a toad, a toad to a snake, a snake to a pig, a pig to a man, and a man to a worm.
More Ambrose Bierce Quotes
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An election is nothing more than the advanced auction of stolen goods.
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Patriotism. Combustible rubbish ready to the torch of any one ambitious to illuminate his name.
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Christian, n.: one who believes that the New Testament is a divinely inspired book admirably suited to the spiritual needs of his neighbor.
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Quotation, n: The act of repeating erroneously the words of another.
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Laughter, n. An interior convulsion, producing a distortion of the features and accompanied by inarticulate noises. It is infectious and, though intermittent, incurable.
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Year: A period of three hundred and sixty-five disappointments.
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He who thinks with difficulty believes with alacrity.
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The only distinction that democracies reward is a high degree of conformity.
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What is a democrat? One who believes that the republicans have ruined the country. What is a republican? One who believes that the democrats would ruin the country.
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Optimism – the doctrine or belief that everything is beautiful, including what is ugly.
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Vote: the instrument and symbol of a freeman’s power to make a fool of himself and a wreck of his country.
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RUMOR, n. A favorite weapon of the assassins of character.
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PAIN, n. An uncomfortable frame of mind that may have a physical basis in something that is being done to the body, or may be purely mental, caused by the good fortune of another.
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Fidelity – a virtue peculiar to those who are about to be betrayed.
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Lottery: A tax on people who are bad at math.
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