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We’ve got black and white, we’ve got Hispanic and Asian, we got gay, straight, and Guttenberg, all working together for one common goal: to get the mirror ball.

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My first car was a motorcycle.
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If you’re a guy, you have absolutely no idea what’s going on at any time in the relationship, ever.
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I don’t know anything about computers.
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The reason I hate publicists is because I think if we got rid of them everything would be on equal footing.
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When you have kids, you instantly feel that you do not want to do them wrong. .
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You don’t cruise the Internet looking for your name and walk away with a good feeling. So, I never do it.
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The reason why you know more funny dudes than funny chicks is that dudes are funnier than chicks.
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I’m a sort of nuts-and-bolts guy. I’m into turning wrenches and swinging a hammer and wrenching on cars.
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There are certain things women are better at than men.
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When you’re picking a basketball team, you’ll take the brother over the guy with the yarmulke. Why? Because you’re playing the odds.
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I swear my car won’t run unless I’m picking my nose: At least, I’m that superstitious about it, so I don’t want to take any chances.
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I’m like John Q. Public. I represent what every guy wants and needs.
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That’s the thing I love about sports: sports force you to quit. You can’t pursue your dream till you’re 46. When it comes to acting, writing, comedy, nobody ever stops you.
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The reason why you know more funny dudes than funny chicks is that dudes are funnier than chicks. If my daughter has a mediocre sense of humor
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I used to be a Democrat, now I’m basically a Republican.
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I liked radio, or podcasting. I like talking minus the camera and the script part. All those mediums are different, and they are all different with their pluses and minuses.
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