Maybe it’s weird, but I don’t feel in any way, shape or form that I’m taking over his show.
ADAM CAROLLALets not focus on saving a nickel… lets focus on making a buck.
More Adam Carolla Quotes
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All TV is, is really: ‘Don’t you want to be this, aren’t you glad you’re not that.’ There’s nothing really in the middle.
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Well, guys are better at mechanical stuff and women are better at emotional stuff.
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The best gift you can give yourself is some drive–that thing inside of you that gets you out the door to the gym, job interviews, and dates.
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This is why the terrorists hate us. And it’s not the glitter and it’s not the pomp and circumstance.
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Screw guilt — I could have sex with 10 men and it wouldn’t bother me. I’m an atheist!
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There is a ton of pressure and you need to read cue cards. I am not a good cue card reader.
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People look at me, and they go, ‘You’re white, you’re smart, you must have went to college. You must have grown up with money.’
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Wearing Crocs is like getting blown by a dude. It feels great until you look down and realize you’re gay.
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I don’t like soccer. I think it makes you soft. And by the way, you telling me it’s the biggest whatever in the World, look, they drink tea everywhere too; they’re pussies, you understand? I want some coffee.
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Everyone keeps saying, “Oh my God, oh my God, how intimidating.” It’s like saying, “How could you date Jennifer Aniston after she’s been with Brad Pitt?” I don’t care.
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I like my parents but they are just not good parents. They are nice enough people. I’m not interested in hurting their feelings.
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I like radio and live performing stuff. I don’t like the television stuff as much.
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I’d never hurt another person.
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. It’s an even wooden floor, and may the best man or woman win. And I say God bless Dancing with the Stars, and God bless the USA.
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If in 1989 I said, ‘I have an idea: Bottle water and sell it. And charge more than a beer,’ they would have chased me around with a giant butterfly net. The same with paying to watch a television station.
ADAM CAROLLA