Chicks named Tammy have a greater chance of actually driving a Mercedes than a chick named Mercedes.
ADAM CAROLLAI don’t think I’ve ever seen pie advertised. That’s how you know it’s good. They advertise ice cream and other desserts.
More Adam Carolla Quotes
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People who fail, excel at avoiding opportunity.
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I have feelings that are to the right, and I have feelings that land on the left side of the aisle.
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When you’re doing a radio show, you can express yourself.
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The believe-in-yourself adage is grossly overrated.
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If you spend your life walking through somebody else’s museum, you never find out whether you’re Rembrandt or not.
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I want to work for myself, and I do work for myself. I make plenty of money working for myself.
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I’m just gonna tell her, “Be a staff writer for a sitcom. Because they’ll have to hire you, they can’t really fire you, and you don’t have to produce that much. It’ll be awesome.”
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I am not agnostic. I am atheist. I don’t think there is no God; I know there’s no God. I know there’s no God the same way I know many other laws in our universe.
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I like the freedom of podcasting. With podcasting you can really mess around with the form and the format. You can do as much time as you like without having to pause for commercials.
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A lot of guys and people in our society think that chicks just love dudes with money.
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I don’t burn any calories trying to be masculine; I just happen to be from that world.
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The very definition of ‘beauty’ is outside.
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If you want to have a good life, you should focus on your family, on your business, on your dog, on your fun, and you’ll have a good life.
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Figure out what to do, then take a nap.
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Screw guilt — I could have sex with 10 men and it wouldn’t bother me. I’m an atheist!
ADAM CAROLLA






