black
grey
blue
red
brown
white

Today is a brand new day. A day of change, of promise, of creativity, of kindness, and of love. I’m going back to bed.

Bob Saget

If you’re a host of a video show and you’re on the cleanest show on television for eight years, people want to say, ‘Well, that’s what that person does.’ That was the dilemma for me, career-wise.
BOB SAGET

Career Eight Wise
Most people argue over who’s right, not about what the truth is.
BOB SAGET

Arguing People Truth
I have three kids, the oldest is 18 and her friends are going to see it The Aristocrats because they told her they’re going to see it, especially her guy friends.
BOB SAGET

Aristocracy Guy Kids
A lot of people ask me what my favorite episode of Full House was, I always tell them: it was the last one!
BOB SAGET

House Lasts People
My dad’s like, If your mom and I are having sex and we videotape it and she falls out of bed funny, can I win ten-thousand dollars?
BOB SAGET

Dad Dollar Funny Mom Sex
People do what they do to each other and they feed on it.
BOB SAGET

Each Other Feed People
What do you do if you’re in the car and your girlfriend touches your crotch then asks you to remind her to get kitchen scissors?
BOB SAGET

Car Girlfriend Kitchen
Just went to the gym and worked on every body part. Four people slapped me.
BOB SAGET

Body Four People
25, 30 years ago, that meant something, they were making some money. And they were doing all sorts of comedy, screaming at the audience, basically crowd control. And then there was the whole urban comedy scene.
BOB SAGET

Comedy Crowds Screaming Something Sort Years
If you’re hanging out with two negative people, do they equal one positive person?
BOB SAGET

Hanging Negative People Two
When someone you love is hurting, if it was possible, you’d want to take their pain for them. But do I really want cramps and sore boobs?
BOB SAGET

Hurt Love Pain Someone
Jon Lovitz. Jon, your act is like masturbation: you’re the only one who enjoys it, and you should be arrested for doing it in public.
BOB SAGET

Enjoy Masturbation Public
Think well of yourself and others will too. Unless those others are in government, banking, or show business.
BOB SAGET

Banking Government Thinking
It was a JOB; the video show was a JOB; you don’t tell the Aristocrats joke at 8 o’clock at night on network tv, it would be funny though. But those guys know I like dirty stuff, I like clean stuff too.
BOB SAGET

Dirty Jobs Night
Bob Saget was known, in the comedy clubs in those days, as extremely funny but with dark humor. It was always an inside joke among comics, when he got Full House, it was, like, wow, hes playing this all-American dad kind of thing.
BOB SAGET

Dad Dark House
Nobody can tell me what I can or can’t do, except they can.
BOB SAGET

Except Nobody People

Today is a brand new day. A day of change, of promise, of creativity, of kindness, and of love. I’m going back to bed.

Related Topics

Popular Authors

Today is a brand new day. A day of change, of promise, of creativity, of kindness, and of love. I’m going back to bed.

Related Topics

Popular Authors

More Bob Saget Quotes