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I spent a year in that town, one Sunday.

George Burns

I’m at the age now where just putting my cigar in its holder is a thrill.
GEORGE BURNS

Age Cigar Holder Just Now Put Thrill
Happiness? A good cigar, a good meal, a good cigar and a good woman – or a bad woman; it depends on how much happiness you can handle.
GEORGE BURNS

Bad Cigar Depend Good Handle Happiness Much Woman
This is the sixth book I’ve written, which isn’t bad for a guy who’s only read two.
GEORGE BURNS

Book Guy Raed Sixth Two Written
If it’s a good script I’ll do it. And if it’s a bad script, and they pay me enough, I’ll do it.
GEORGE BURNS

And Bad Enough Good IT Pay Script
Don’t stay in bed, unless you can make money in bed.
GEORGE BURNS

Bed Make Money Stay
It’s hard for me to get used to these changing times. I can remember when the air was clean and sex was dirty.
GEORGE BURNS

Aur Change Clean Dirty Hard Remember These Used
I look to the future because that’s where I’m going to spend the rest of my life.
GEORGE BURNS

Because Future Go Life Look Rest Spend
Acting is all about honesty. If you can fake that, you’ve got it made.
GEORGE BURNS

Act Fake God Honesty Inside
If you ask what is the single most important key to longevity, I would have to say it is avoiding worry, stress and tension. And if you didn’t ask me, I’d still have to say it.
GEORGE BURNS

Ask Avoid Important Longevity Most Say Single Tension
I smoke ten to fifteen cigars a day. At my age I have to hold on to something.
GEORGE BURNS

Age Fidteenm Cigar Hold Smoke Something
The secret of a good sermon is to have a good beginning and a good ending, then having the two as close together as possible.
GEORGE BURNS

Begining Close End Good Have Possible Secret Together
I honestly think it is better to be a failure at something you love than to be a success at something you hate.
GEORGE BURNS

Better Failure Hate Honesty Something Success
I’d rather be a failure at something I love than a success at something I hate.
GEORGE BURNS

Access Failure Hate Rather Something
The most important thing in acting is honesty. If you can fake that, you’ve got it made.
GEORGE BURNS

Fake Got Honesty Important Made Most Thing
You know you’re getting old when you stoop to tie your shoelaces and wonder what else you could do while you’re down there.
GEORGE BURNS

Down Else Get Stoop While Wonder
I can’t afford to die; I’d lose too much money.
GEORGE BURNS

Afford Die Lose Money Much Too

I spent a year in that town, one Sunday.

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I spent a year in that town, one Sunday.

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