I’ve gathered some of my close musical and comedian friends, and we’re going to see if we can’t bring a few laughs to these soldiers, raise some money, and hopefully lift their spirits.
RON WHITEA lot of people can find something to laugh at in my humor, I guess.
More Ron White Quotes
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Here’s how I operate. When I see something I like, 20 years later, I ask her brother for her phone number. She don’t even see me coming.
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The next time you have a thought… let it go.
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I loved listening to laughter even as a little kid.
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I was considered by my peers to be a good comedian. So that’s all I ever strived to do was get some recognition from my peers.
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If you look at the common denominator of all the comics who have had big success, it’s being true to their nature… that’s what takes a long time to learn.
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If I sit down to write a joke about, whatever, the polluted Gulf of Mexico, it comes out mundane to me.
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I believe that if life gives you lemons, you should make lemonade… And try to find somebody whose life has given them vodka, and have a party.
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Everybody I know is a joke writer.
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It never dawned on me that I had the option of becoming a comedian. I come from a little dirt street town in northwest Texas, and they really don’t talk about the arts there much on career day.
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All I know how to do is take what’s on my mind and spit it out funny. I don’t know what else I could do besides comedy.
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I was a little one-trick pony. I do what I’ve always done. That’s really where my best stuff comes from. I don’t know how it happens. It just happens.
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Diamonds – that’ll shut her up… for a minute!
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I was always a funny guy. I don’t think anybody that makes it to this level of stand-up wasn’t a funny guy when they were young.
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You can teach somebody how to be a brain surgeon, but you cannot teach them how to walk on a stage and make people laugh.
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My shows are not all-the-way filthy, but they can be.
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I’ve asked these guys in rock bands with all the 18-wheelers driving to the venue how they make money. I just don’t understand it. But I don’t understand a lot of things.
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If you become famous and don’t have a live show to back it up, they’re not going to pay you any money.
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I do a lot of gay-friendly stuff in my show, and men, women, they all love it. I practice non-judgment in my daily life and hope other people do the same thing.
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I don’t think we have a surplus of fine educators in this country that we can just start dropping them for no reason whatsoever.
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I don’t do talk shows or go on Dr. Phil’s show. He’s a friend of mine, and, no, he doesn’t give me any advice. He doesn’t give solicited advice.
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You wanna get the truth out of me, get me hammered.
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You can’t fix stupid.
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I’m not the judge of who that is, but I am a believer that no debt in the universe goes unpaid. If you try to buy early, you’ll pay late.
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It went from Bob Newhart to Flip Wilson to Bill Cosby to Richard Pryor to George Carlin to Cheech and Chong. I had all these records.
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I love Cincinnati, but you can keep that spaghetti chili product!
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I always found that the closer I got to who I really am, on stage, the more they responded to it.
RON WHITE