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I get e-mail from all over the world, and from lawyers and doctors and whoever – plumbers and drywall hangers.

Ron White

I’ve got a great cigar collection – it’s actually not a collection, because that would imply I wasn’t going to smoke every last one of ’em.
RON WHITE

Cigar Collection Go Great Imply Last Smoke
All I know how to do is take what’s on my mind and spit it out funny. I don’t know what else I could do besides comedy.
RON WHITE

Besides Comedy Funny Know Lake Mind Spit
I could do no wrong in my mother’s eyes from the day I was born. My fans bought her a very nice house in San Antonio, and she has a great life.
RON WHITE

Born Day Eye Great Horse Life Mother Nice Wrong
My shows are not all-the-way filthy, but they can be.
RON WHITE

All Be Can Show Way
I go to more open mic nights than open mikers.
RON WHITE

Mic Milker More Night Open
There have been times in my life that I’ve had a ton of vices, and my demons have run amok for years and years and years.
RON WHITE

Demon Life Run Time Ton Vice Year
I didn’t get where I am today by worryin’ about how I’d feel tomorrow.
RON WHITE

Feel Get Today Tomorrow Worry
I believe everything creative is somewhat collaborative.
RON WHITE

Believe Collaborative Creative Everything Somewhat
The Majestic Theatre in San Antone is as good as it gets.
RON WHITE

Country Good Majestic Theatre
I always found that the closer I got to who I really am, on stage, the more they responded to it.
RON WHITE

Always Found Closer More Really Respond Stage
Anybody could say anything they want about me, and it literally never penetrates my skin.
RON WHITE

Anybody Anything Could Literacy Penetrate Say Skin
I believe that if life gives you lemons, you should make lemonade… And try to find somebody whose life has given them vodka, and have a party.
RON WHITE

Believe Lemon Life Party Somebody Try
The only way to stay sharp is to do live shows. There is no part-time comedy.
RON WHITE

Comedy Live Only Part Sharp Show Stay Time Way
I was talking to a guy who was holding his 18-month-old daughter with the only limb he had left, and he had a smile on his face. I thought, ‘I’m not even a 10th of this man.’
RON WHITE

Daughter Face Guy Hold Left Limb Month Smile Talk Though
My biggest pet peeve, I guess, is other comedians criticizing Larry the Cable Guy.
RON WHITE

Biggest Cable Comedian Criticise Guy Other Peeve Pet
My goal is just to become a better comedian.
RON WHITE

Become Better Comedian Goal Just

I get e-mail from all over the world, and from lawyers and doctors and whoever – plumbers and drywall hangers.

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I get e-mail from all over the world, and from lawyers and doctors and whoever – plumbers and drywall hangers.

Related Topics

Popular Authors

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