“Looking and not finding is certainly one of the most frustrating ways to spend time.”

The two biggest sellers in any bookstore are the cookbooks and the diet books. The cookbooks tell you how to prepare the food, and the diet books tell you how not to eat any of it!

The third rule of life is this: Everything you buy today is smaller, more expensive, and not as good as it was yesterday.

I’ve learned that no one is perfect until you fall in love with them.

Death is a distant rumor to the young.

I’ve learned… That sometimes all a person needs is a hand to hold and a heart to understand.

I don’t know anything offhand that mystifies Americans more than the cotton they put in pill bottles. Why do they do it? Are you supposed to put the cotton back in once you’ve taken a pill out?

Being kind is more important than being right.

Guns do not make you a killer. I think killing makes you a killer. You can kill someone with a baseball bat or a car, but no one is trying to ban you from driving to the ball game.

Anyone who watches golf on television would enjoy watching the grass grow on the greens.

I’ve learned, That to ignore the facts does not change the facts.

One of the sweetest things in life: a letter from a friend.

Conservatives are more religious than liberals–although there is no evidence that they’re nicer people because of it.

I’ve learned that we should be glad God doesn’t give us everything we ask for.

Unfortunately, propaganda works.

If you get murdered because you go on a date with someone you met on the Internet, you probably deserved it.

No one ever writes a book in which he is the bad guy.

There is no more lively sensation than that of pain; its impressions are certain and dependable, they never deceive as may those of the pleasure women perpetually feign and almost never experience.

We are in the process of making the world, to a certain extent, in our own image.

An America that looks away is ignoring not just the sins of the past but the sins of the present and the certain sins of the future.

You have a movie and it proves itself and then certain things happen.

What was the opposite of linkage blindness? What described being certain of something without any kind of evidence?…The term was faith.

Under certain circumstances there are few hours in life more agreeable than the hour dedicated to the ceremony known as afternoon tea.

There may be here and there a worker who for certain reasons unexplainable to us does not join a union of labor. That is his right. It is his legal right, no matter how morally wrong he may be. It is his legal right, and no one can or dare question his exercise of that legal right.

There is almost nothing you can say that holds up as a generalization, because it depends on too many factors: size, modulation, the rest of the field, a certain consistency that color has with forms, and the statement you’re trying to make.