IMAGINATION, n. A warehouse of facts, with poet and liar in joint ownership.
AMBROSE BIERCEHe who thinks with difficulty believes with alacrity. A fool is a natural proselyte, but he must be caught young, for his convictions, unlike those of the wise, harden with age.
More Ambrose Bierce Quotes
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Love: A temporary insanity curable by marriage.
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Politics: A strife of interests masquerading as a contest of principles. The conduct of public affairs for private advantage.
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Mausoleum, n: the final and funniest folly of the rich.
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Divorce: a resumption of diplomatic relations and rectification of boundaries.
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Ambition. An overmastering desire to be vilified by enemies while living and made ridiculous by friends when dead.
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The most affectionate creature in the world is a wet dog.
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Don’t steal; thou’lt never thus compete successfully in business. Cheat.
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Conservative, n: A statesman who is enamored of existing evils, as distinguished from the Liberal who wishes to replace them with others.
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Future. That period of time in which our affairs prosper, our friends are true and our happiness is assured.
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Saint: A dead sinner revised and edited.
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Bore, n. A person who talks when you wish him to listen.
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Present, n. That part of eternity dividing the domain of disappointment from the realm of hope.
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Debt, n. An ingenious substitute for the chain and whip of the slavedriver.
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Accordion, n. An instrument in harmony with the sentiments of an assassin.
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Labor is one of the processes by which A acquires property for B.
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