Ocean: A body of water occupying about two-thirds of a world made for man – who has no gills.
AMBROSE BIERCEHe who thinks with difficulty believes with alacrity. A fool is a natural proselyte, but he must be caught young, for his convictions, unlike those of the wise, harden with age.
More Ambrose Bierce Quotes
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Accordion, n. An instrument in harmony with the sentiments of an assassin.
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Optimism – the doctrine or belief that everything is beautiful, including what is ugly.
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Bore, n. A person who talks when you wish him to listen.
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Riot – A popular entertainment given to the military by innocent bystanders.
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ULTIMATUM, n. In diplomacy, a last demand before resorting to concessions.
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Responsibility, n. A detachable burden easily shifted to the shoulders of God, Fate, Fortune, Luck or one’s neighbor. In the days of astrology it was customary to unload it upon a star.
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Christian, n.: one who believes that the New Testament is a divinely inspired book admirably suited to the spiritual needs of his neighbor.
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What is a democrat? One who believes that the republicans have ruined the country. What is a republican? One who believes that the democrats would ruin the country.
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PITY, n. A failing sense of exemption, inspired by contrast.
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PAIN, n. An uncomfortable frame of mind that may have a physical basis in something that is being done to the body, or may be purely mental, caused by the good fortune of another.
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Death is not the end. There remains the litigation over the estate.
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Eulogy. Praise of a person who has either the advantages of wealth and power, or the consideration to be dead.
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Marriage, n: the state or condition of a community consisting of a master, a mistress, and two slaves, making in all, two.
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The hardest tumble a man can make is to fall over his own bluff.
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Perseverance – a lowly virtue whereby mediocrity achieves an inglorious success.
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