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The hardest tumble a man can make is to fall over his own bluff.

Ambrose Bierce

Future. That period of time in which our affairs prosper, our friends are true and our happiness is assured.
AMBROSE BIERCE

Affair Assurance Future Happiness Prosperity Time
Marriage, n: the state or condition of a community consisting of a master, a mistress, and two slaves, making in all, two.
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Community Marriage Master Mistress Slave
Riot – A popular entertainment given to the military by innocent bystanders.
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Entertainment Innocent Military Popular
Accordion, n. An instrument in harmony with the sentiments of an assassin.
AMBROSE BIERCE

Assasination Harmony Instrument
RUMOR, n. A favorite weapon of the assassins of character.
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Assassination Character Weapon
Conservative, n: A statesman who is enamored of existing evils, as distinguished from the Liberal who wishes to replace them with others.
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Evil Existence Philosophy Replacement
LAWYER, n. One skilled in circumvention of the law.
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Law Oneself Skills
Mayonnaise: One of the sauces which serve the French in place of a state religion.
AMBROSE BIERCE

Food Place Religion Service State
The partisan strife in which the people of the country are permitted to periodically engage does not tend to the development of ugly traits of character, but merely discloses those that preexist.
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Country Development Engagement Existence People Strife
He who thinks with difficulty believes with alacrity. A fool is a natural proselyte, but he must be caught young, for his convictions, unlike those of the wise, harden with age.
AMBROSE BIERCE

Age Believe Fools Hard Thinking Wisdom Young
Absurdity, n.: A statement or belief manifestly inconsistent with one’s own opinion.
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Belief Manifestation Opinion Statement
Politics: A strife of interests masquerading as a contest of principles. The conduct of public affairs for private advantage.
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Advantage Affair Interest Principle Private
Don’t steal; thou’lt never thus compete successfully in business. Cheat.
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Business Cheating Complete Steal Success
War is God’s way of teaching Americans geography.
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God Place Teaching War
You don’t have to be stupid to be a Christian, but it probably helps.
AMBROSE BIERCE

Help Religion Stupidity
Women of genius commonly have masculine faces, figures and manners. In transplanting brains to an alien soil God leaves a little of the original earth clinging to the roots.
AMBROSE BIERCE

Appearance Earth Face Genius God Leaving Nature Original Root Woman

The hardest tumble a man can make is to fall over his own bluff.

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The hardest tumble a man can make is to fall over his own bluff.

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