What goes up must come down. But don’t expect it to come down where you can find it.
LILY TOMLINMy politics are just inclined to be empathetic and humanistic. I grew up with so many different kinds of people with different politics, different religion, no religion, no politics, education, no education, and I was infatuated with all of them.
More Lily Tomlin Quotes
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Why is it that when we talk to God we’re said to be praying but when God talks to us we’re schizophrenic?
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The larger picture is really to swing people’s awareness of what really is moral.
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Being a New Yorker is never having to say you are sorry.
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Lady, I do not make up things. That is lies. Lies are not true. But the truth could be made up if yo know how. And that’s the truth.
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Well, if I can be of any help at all, you are in worse trouble than I thought.
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No matter how cynical you become, it’s never enough to keep up.
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I bought a box of animal crackers, but there was nothing inside. They’d eaten each other.
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If beauty is truth, why don’t women go to the library to have their hair done?
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Sometimes I feel like a figment of my own imagination.
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I worry about kids today – because of the sexual revolution, they’re going to grow up and never know what “dirty” means.
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I like a teacher who gives you something to take home to think about besides homework.
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I always wondered why somebody doesn’t do something about that. Then I realized I was somebody.
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When we speak to God, we call it prayer; when God speaks back, we call it psychosis!
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But there are too many people that make so much money at the cost of lives of other humans and for no reason but to make the money.
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Even when I’m being funny, I’m deadly serious.
LILY TOMLIN






