“Man invented language to satisfy his deep need to complain.”

9 to 5 made people aware of equal pay for equal work. It hasn’t really happened, but it has come closer.

Even when I’m being funny, I’m deadly serious.

Lady, I do not make up things. That is lies. Lies are not true. But the truth could be made up if yo know how. And that’s the truth.

There will be sex after death, we just won’t be able to feel it.

If evolution was worth its salt, it should’ve evolved something better than ‘survival of the fittest.’ I think a better idea would be ‘survival of the wittiest.’ At least, that way, creatures that didn’t survive could’ve died laughing.

Having a real public outlet is how you imprint something for yourself. It’s just a matter of timing. It’s like you’ve marked your territory.

I like a teacher who gives you something to take home to think about besides homework.

You know being relevant or coming up with something interesting, funny to say about what’s current is just as hard as it might ever be depending on the serendipity of it all.

We are people with lives, not consumers with lifestyles.

Being a New Yorker is never having to say you are sorry.

Every day I read the newspapers, and no matter how cynical I get, it’s imposssible to keep up.

If love is the answer, could you please rephrase the question?

Ninety eight percent of the adults in this country are decent, hardworking, honest Americans. It’s the other lousy two percent that get all the publicity. But then, we elected them.

After all, in private, we’re all misfits.

I wanted to be a stage actress. I wanted to be a New York actress and have a community with other actors. I didn’t want to get famous; I always thought getting famous was a drag on you.

What I appreciate is acknowledging to the audience that I think they have brains.

There’s always haters, no matter what you’re doing – whether they’re complaining that everything you do sounds the same, or it’s too different.

I personally think we developed language because of our deep need to complain.

Language was invented because of the deep human need to complain.

One cannot scold or complain at every word. Learn to endure patiently, or else, as I live and breathe, you shall learn it whether you want or not.

If you place your head in a lion’s mouth, then you cannot complain one day if he happens to bite it off.

Franco will bring the army from Castille. The ambassador will complain, causing a schism. Rivera’s men will be part of the force. The great man will be denied entry to the gulf.

Don’t complain about growing old — many, many people do not have that privilege.

If you are complaining about things in your life, you are on the complaining frequency, and you are not in a position to attract what you want. Get on to the frequency of good with your thoughts and words. Firstly you will feel good, and secondly you will be on the frequency of receiving more good.