“I can handle reality in small doses, but as a lifestyle, it’s much too confining.”

We don’t care. We don’t have to. We’re the phone company.

When I’ve had a meltdown, people will say to me, “Well, you failed to keep your sense of humor.”

You can’t expect insights, even the big ones, to make you suddenly understand everything. But I figure: Hey it’s a step in the right direction if they leave you confused in a deeper way.

The start to a better world is the belief that it is possible.

I try to be cynical, but it’s so hard to keep up.

Wouldn’t it be great if we all grew up to be what we wanted to be? The world would be full of nurses, firemen, and ballerinas.

9 to 5 made people aware of equal pay for equal work. It hasn’t really happened, but it has come closer.

Even when I’m being funny, I’m deadly serious.

Lady, I do not make up things. That is lies. Lies are not true. But the truth could be made up if yo know how. And that’s the truth.

There will be sex after death, we just won’t be able to feel it.

If evolution was worth its salt, it should’ve evolved something better than ‘survival of the fittest.’ I think a better idea would be ‘survival of the wittiest.’ At least, that way, creatures that didn’t survive could’ve died laughing.

Having a real public outlet is how you imprint something for yourself. It’s just a matter of timing. It’s like you’ve marked your territory.

I like a teacher who gives you something to take home to think about besides homework.

You know being relevant or coming up with something interesting, funny to say about what’s current is just as hard as it might ever be depending on the serendipity of it all.

We are people with lives, not consumers with lifestyles.

Being a New Yorker is never having to say you are sorry.

Life as a Christ follower will always be a learning process of depending less on our own strength and more on God’s power.

I often get offered things that are so similar to things that I have done, and life is too short. When you make a film or a show, as you get older, that’s a lot of time to be doing something that you’re not absolutely invested in or in love with.

I think life is perverse. It can be beautiful, but it won’t.

O, let my land be a land where Liberty Is crowned with no false patriotic wreath, But opportunity is real, and life is free, Equality is in the air we breathe.

If I really want an unrushed life, I must underwhelm my schedule so God has room to overwhelm my soul.

It’s not where you’re trying to go in life that is the problem, it’s what are you willing to leave behind in order to get there.

How does a man decide in what order to abandon his life?

Don’t be a pigeon if you were born to be an eagle. Experience God’s altitude for your life.