Before you criticize a man, walk a mile in his shoes. That way, when you do criticize him, you’ll be a mile away and have his shoes.
STEVE MARTINI started a grease fire at McDonald’s – threw a match in the cook’s hair.
More Steve Martin Quotes
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I thought yesterday was the first day of the rest of my life but it turns out today is.
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How many people have never raised their hand before?
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I was deeply unhappy, but I didn’t know it because I was so happy all the time.
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Thankfully, persistence is a great substitute for talent.
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No art comes from the conscious mind.
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Boy, those French: they have a different word for everything!
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I believe in equality. Equality for everybody. No matter how stupid they are or how superior I am to them.
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I was always very shy but as I get older I think, What am I being shy for? You just grow weary of your own hang-ups.
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It’s not the size of the nose that matters, it’s what’s inside that counts.
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The greatest thing you can do is surprise yourself.
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Some nights, alone, he thinks of her, and some nights, alone, she thinks of him. Some night these thoughts, separated by miles and time zones, occur at the same objective moment, and Ray and Mirabelle are connected without ever knowing it.
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Through the years, I have learned there is no harm in charging oneself up with delusions between moments of valid inspiration.
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You can’t really conduct your life by one or two phrases.
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There’s someone out there for everyone – even if you need a pickaxe, a compass, and night goggles to find them.
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I just downloaded eleven hundred books onto my Kindle, and now I can’t lift it.
STEVE MARTIN