Housework can kill you if done right.
ERMA BOMBECKFriends are “annuals” that need seasonal nurturing to bear blossoms. Family is a “perennial” that comes up year after year, enduring the droughts of absence and neglect. There’s a place in the garden for both of them.
More Erma Bombeck Quotes
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I was trampled to death by a man who believed his luggage would be the first piece off. If he were an experienced traveler, he would know that the first piece of luggage belongs to no one. It’s just a dummy suitcase to give everyone hope.
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Have you any idea how many children it takes to turn off one light in the kitchen Three. It takes one to say What light and two more to say I didn’t turn it on.
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My second favorite household chore is ironing. My first being hitting my head on the top bunk bed until I faint.
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Never go to a doctor whose office plants have died.
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A grandparent is the only baby-sitter who doesn’t charge more after midnight – or anything before midnight.
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If I had my life to live over, instead of wishing away nine months of pregnancy, I’d have cherished ever moment and realized that the wonderment growing inside me was the only chance in life to assist God in a miracle.
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Seize the moment. Remember all those women on the ‘Titanic’ who waved off the dessert cart.
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Never have more children than you have car windows.
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Every puppy should have a boy.
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No one ever died from sleeping in an unmade bed.
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Laughter rises out of tragedy when you need it the most, and rewards you for your courage.
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Did you ever notice that the first piece of luggage on the carousel never belongs to anyone?
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Friends are “annuals” that need seasonal nurturing to bear blossoms. Family is a “perennial” that comes up year after year, enduring the droughts of absence and neglect. There’s a place in the garden for both of them.
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When you look like your passport photo, it’s time to go home.
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People usually survive their illnesses, but the paper work eventually does them in. Filing a claim for insurance is terminal.
ERMA BOMBECK