black
grey
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Sleep! The most beautiful experience in life. Except drink.

W. C. Fields

I never drink water because of the disgusting things that fish do in it.
W. C. FIELDS

Animal Myself Perspective Sea
The nation needs to return to the colonial way of life, when a wife was judged by the amount of wood she could split.
W. C. FIELDS

Herself Judgement Life Nation Need Wife
There’s no such thing as a tough child – if you parboil them first for seven hours, they always come out tender.
W. C. FIELDS

Children Parents Tough
If I had to live my life over, I’d live over a saloon.
W. C. FIELDS

Life Live Myself
My illness is due to my doctor’s insistence that I drink milk, a whitish fluid they force down helpless babies.
W. C. FIELDS

Doctor Force Myself
You can’t trust water: Even a straight stick turns crooked in it.
W. C. FIELDS

Belief Trust Yourself
I cook with wine, sometimes I even add it to the food.
W. C. FIELDS

Food Myself Wine
Take me down to the bar! We’ll drink breakfast together!
W. C. FIELDS

Togetherness Travel
I never voted for anybody. I always voted against.
W. C. FIELDS

Myself Vote
If you can’t dazzle them with brilliance, baffle them with bull.
W. C. FIELDS

Choice Inspirational Yourself
Some weasel took the cork out of my lunch.
W. C. FIELDS

Animal Food
I like children. If they’re properly cooked.
W. C. FIELDS

Children Food Myself
Sex isn’t necessary. You don’t die without it, but you can die having it.
W. C. FIELDS

Death Necessary Sex Yourself
If pigs had wings, they would be pigeons.
W. C. FIELDS

Animal Funny Wings
I don’t drink water. Have you seen the way it rusts pipes?
W. C. FIELDS

Destroy Myself See
Beer: Helping ugly people have sex since 3000 B. C.
W. C. FIELDS

Appearance Help People Sex Ugly

Sleep! The most beautiful experience in life. Except drink.

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Sleep! The most beautiful experience in life. Except drink.

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