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When doctors and undertakers meet, they wink at each other.

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Doctor Togetherness

Bagwalas

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Marilyn Monroe Paulo Coelho Abraham Lincoln C. S. Lewis Khalil Gibran Charlie Chaplin Gautama Buddha Isaac Newton

I have been advised by the best medical authority, at my age, not to attempt to give up alcohol.
W. C. FIELDS

Advice Age Alcohol Authority Give Up Myself
The nation needs to return to the colonial way of life, when a wife was judged by the amount of wood she could split.
W. C. FIELDS

Herself Judgement Life Nation Need Wife
Reality is an illusion that occurs due to the lack of alcohol.
W. C. FIELDS

Alcohol Illusion Reality
Never try to impress a woman, because if you do she’ll expect you to keep up the standard for the rest of your life.
W. C. FIELDS

Expectation Herself Life Man Woman Yourself
Never give a sucker an even break.
W. C. FIELDS

Break One Liner
It is well to remember that there are five reasons for drinking: the arrival of a friend, one’s present or future thirst, the excellence of the cognac, or any other reason.
W. C. FIELDS

Excellence Friendship Future Present Reason Remember
Some people are born losers; others acquire the knack gradually.
W. C. FIELDS

Born Lose People
It ain’t what they call you, it’s what you answer to.
W. C. FIELDS

Attitude Deep Yourself
When we have lost everything, including hope, life becomes a disgrace, and death a duty.
W. C. FIELDS

Death Hope Life Lost
A rich man is nothing but a poor man with money.
W. C. FIELDS

Man Money Poor Rich
A man without a woman is like a neck without a pain.
W. C. FIELDS

Man Pain Woman
When doctors and undertakers meet, they wink at each other.
W. C. FIELDS

Doctor Togetherness
If at first you don’t succeed, try, try again. Then quit. There’s no point in being a damn fool about it.
W. C. FIELDS

Fools Inspirational Quit Success Yourself
It’s a funny old world. A man’s lucky if he gets out of it alive.
W. C. FIELDS

Alive Funny Old World
I have spent a lot of time searching through the Bible for loopholes.
W. C. FIELDS

Myself Religion Time
I drink therefore I am.
W. C. FIELDS

Instagram Captions Myself One Liner

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