Jill, we became parents so we could tell our kids what to do. Otherwise we’re just the tallest people living here.
TIM ALLENAll men like to think that they can do it alone, but a real man knows that there no substitute for support , encouragement or a pit crew.
More Tim Allen Quotes
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Boys can be disgusting. You can’t leave us alone for any length of time because we will burn something, blow something up or paint something. We’re just obnoxious.
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Dogs will eat till they die. Cats will leave food in the dish, incomprehensible to a dog.
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Dog’s listen, or appear to listen. I think they hear blah, blah, blah, FOOD, blah, blah, blah. They appear to be listening to you.
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I love doing logos. I’ve been a graphic artist all my life.
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In marriage, compromise nurtures the relationship.
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The big advantage to playing the Venetian in Las Vegas – where it’s a beautiful theater – is that unlike other places, even many other nice venues, I can do a set and lighting cues, I can put on a real show. I can dress up, wear a tux.
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I’m a creative guy, artistically with graphics.
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I’ve gotten so far past the Android and iPhones that I’m back to a flip-phone. It’s funny, you can buy antique flip-phones online. A lot of us collect them. Clearly, they’re considered antiques.
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Men aren’t men until they can get to Sears by themselves.
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Being wealthy when no one else is, is like being the only one at the party with a drink.
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I don’t understand why it has to be either – or – either socialism or democracy. Why can’t we combine things to get the best of each system?
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My mom said the only reason men are alive is for lawn care and vehicle maintenance.
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A guy knows he’s in love when he loses interest in his car for a couple of days.
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Men are pigs. Too bad we own everything.
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Kids learn by example. If I respect Mom, they’re going to respect Mom.
TIM ALLEN