If it ain’t broke, you can probably still fix it.
TIM ALLENYou don’t know what people are really like until they’re under a lot of stress.
More Tim Allen Quotes
-
-
I grew up around hunters. I love guns, bows, arrows, compasses and binoculars. I don’t do any of that stuff, I just like the stuff. I shot one animal, in my life, and I didn’t like it. If I had to skin an animal to eat it, I’d probably eat vegetables.
TIM ALLEN -
Can we take a direct flight back to reality or do we have to change planes in Denver?
TIM ALLEN -
When somebody tells you they’re not very smart, they’re saying exactly the opposite.
TIM ALLEN -
Sometimes you get the sense that the Creator is getting to that point of “Yeah, we might have to reboot.”
TIM ALLEN -
Men often do things for women that they don’t want to do, so that women will do things for men that they don’t want to do.
TIM ALLEN -
I used to live an isolated existence, even in relationships, but now my family knows me for who I really am. Mostly, that’s a good thing.
TIM ALLEN -
Why go to a church to worship God? A church is man made. God never said, “And let there be aluminum siding.” Climbing a tree to talk to God sounds like a better idea since only God can make a tree. And if that tree’s on a golf course, all the better.
TIM ALLEN -
Real men don’t use instructions, son. Besides, this is just the manufacturer’s opinion on how to put this together.
TIM ALLEN -
If you want to condemn yourself for the mistakes you’ve made, let’s be fair, that means you’ve got to congratulate yourself for all the good things you’ve done. It’s okay to say, “God, I wish I’d done this; yeah, but I did do that.” Then it kind of balances out.
TIM ALLEN -
In my experience, it’s all wonderful with girls until about 16. Around that time, boys kind of calm down and start focusing their testosterone. Girls get a little challenging, especially for fathers.
TIM ALLEN -
I’m one of these guys that just spoils the environment. I like ATVs and snowmobiles. I have a motorcycle up there, and I like cruising through the hills.
TIM ALLEN -
There is no greater feeling than when a groom turns to see his bride and has tears in his eyes because she is so beautiful.
TIM ALLEN -
I blend memories. I blend them into one that’s funny. I exaggerate to clarify.
TIM ALLEN -
My mom said the only reason men are alive is for lawn care and vehicle maintenance.
TIM ALLEN -
I’m sad for adults who want to be children. And children who want to be adults.
TIM ALLEN






