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Plan to be spontaneous tomorrow.

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Marilyn Monroe Paulo Coelho Abraham Lincoln C. S. Lewis Khalil Gibran Charlie Chaplin Gautama Buddha Isaac Newton

I wish the first word I ever said was the word “quote”, so right before I die I could say “unquote”.
STEVEN WRIGHT

Death Myself Quote Right Talk Word
When I was a little kid we had a sand box. It was a quicksand box. I was an only child… eventually.
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Children Myself Quick Toy
There’s a fine line between fishing and just standing on the shore like an idiot.
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Idiot Ocean Stand Wait
Why isn’t the number 11 pronounced onety one?
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Mathematics Pronunciation Sound
Whenever I think of the past, it brings back so many memories.
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Memories Myself Past Thinking
Monday is an awful way to spend 1/7 of your life.
STEVEN WRIGHT

Day Life Yourself
Imagine how weird phones would look if your mouth was nowhere near your ears.
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Appearance Imagination Phone Weird Yourself
On the other hand, you have different fingers.
STEVEN WRIGHT

Appearance Different Fingers Hands
How much deeper would the ocean be if sponges didn’t live there?
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Deep Funny Live Nature Ocean
I went to a restaurant that serves ‘breakfast at any time’. So I ordered French Toast during the Renaissance.
STEVEN WRIGHT

Food Funny Myself Service Time
I had some eyeglasses. I was walking down the street when suddenly the prescription ran out.
STEVEN WRIGHT

Eyes Myself Prescription Ran Walk
If a word in the dictionary were misspelled, how would we know?
STEVEN WRIGHT

Literature Word Wrong
$Steven Wright Quote - Five out of four people have trouble with fractions.$

Five out of four people have trouble with fractions.
STEVEN WRIGHT

Funny Mathematics People Trouble
If man evolved from monkeys and apes, why do we still have monkeys and apes?
STEVEN WRIGHT

Animal Evolution Monkey Science
If Dracula can’t see his reflection in a mirror, how come his hair is always so neatly combed?
STEVEN WRIGHT

Hairs Himself Mirror Reflection See
If a mute kid swears, should his mother wash his hands with soap?
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Children Funny Hands Himself Mom

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