When I die, now don’t think that I’m a nut, don’t want no fancy funeral, just one like old King Tut.
STEVE MARTINA day without sunshine is like, you know, night.
More Steve Martin Quotes
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How many people have never raised their hand before?
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Don’t have sex man. It leads to kissing and pretty soon you have to start talking to them.
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Acting is collaborative because you are working with another actor, and it’s almost like a two-man juggling team. You have to really be in sync.
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I was always very shy but as I get older I think, What am I being shy for? You just grow weary of your own hang-ups.
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I believe in equality. Equality for everybody. No matter how stupid they are or how superior I am to them.
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There’s no better way to learn something than to learn it in front of an audience. Your terror drives you.
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There’s someone out there for everyone – even if you need a pickaxe, a compass, and night goggles to find them.
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I’ve got to keep breathing. It’ll be my worst business mistake if I don’t.
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There is one thing I would break up over, and that is if she caught me with another woman. I won’t stand for that.
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All I’ve ever wanted was an honest week’s pay for an honest day’s work.
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I believe that sex is one of the most beautiful, natural, wholesome things that money can buy.
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It’s not what you know, it’s what you think you know.
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I started a grease fire at McDonald’s – threw a match in the cook’s hair.
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I could never be a woman, ’cause I’d just stay home and play with my breasts all day.
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You know that look that women get when they want to have sex? Me neither.
STEVE MARTIN