“The stats win nothing. I’m still sexy. I’m still great.”

And I want to do it the right way, like everybody else, not just a famous figurehead that gets a job because he is a famous basketball player. I want to really learn the business.

I’m pissed off. ‘Cause I knew I did something wrong. I’ll have a hell of a season if I win the championship and average 20 points a game.

I’m dominant every night. I come in every night and get beat up.

He’s the president. I’m the general. Unless I want to get impeached, I got to do what he says.

I beat a lot of teams from the line. You have to have mechanics. But see, what people don’t know about my wrists is my wrists don’t go all the way back.

(The Hack-A-Shaq is) just a way of telling me that you can’t stop me. Thank you. I appreciate it.

I don’t take anything personal. I just have a certain file in my head, so Earthlings must be careful with what they say.

I’m a cop, and cops talk. They called me the day he did it, but did you ever hear me say anything about it? I played ball, because that’s how I am. I’m true.

Y’all reporters like my quotes, don’t you. Yeah, my quotes are Shaqalicious.

When you’re righteous, you don’t have to tell people that you’re righteous.

A pinch is a pinch. If you pinch my right nipple, I’m going to say, ‘ouch.’ If I pinch your right nipple, you’re going to say ‘ouch.’ A foul is a foul and a flagrant is a flagrant.

Obviously, Sam is the type of guy that hides behind his pen and pad. I promise you he wouldn’t say that to my face in a dark alley where it’s just me and him and no witnesses.

I would like to be referred to as ‘The Big Aristotle’.

Tell Yao Ming, ‘Ching-chong-yang-wah-ah-soh.’

I’m the first player in history that doesn’t want to play defense and still gets in foul trouble.

I failed, I think, seven [or] eight times before I finally got my first [championship]. It was just, you know, just about me growing up.

The past influences everything and dictates nothing.

There is nothing more terrorizing than the possibility that nothing is hidden.

Once I looked into it, I was taken aback to learn that pretty much nothing by Joao Gilberto Noll was available in English translation.

Nothing is funnier than confidently doing the wrong thing.

Today, tomorrow,” she said. “A day is nothing. A day is just a match you strike after the ten thousand matches before it have gone out.

The darkness inside your head is something your imagination fills with stories that have nothing to do with the real darkness around you.

Nothing wrong with making money.

There’s nothing to win in yoga. You just do what you can do, one day to the next.