“It’s his show and I’m just trying to make him look good. If we were the same age there might be a little tension, but I’m on my way out… I am here to serve your every need, King James.”

This is a guy who they would have secret meetings about to change the rules. So, that’s going to be my legacy: the most dominant player ever.

I endorse only products I actually use. Like Wheaties keeps offering me money, but I don’t eat Wheaties, so I can’t do it. Now, if Rice Krispies or Frosted Flakes offered me a deal, I’d take it right away. Apple Jacks, I’d be on the box in a heartbeat. Apple Shaqs. Yeah.

I don’t think anything of Laura Frank. You heard me – Laura Frank. Not Lawrence. Laura… It’s not that I blame him, I just wish he’d go to a manly tactic and just fight me. Don’t whine. When he whines, that’s when I change his name of Lawrence Frank.

Once you learn how to do something, you don’t lose it. Unless you die.

They shot the ball well early. What comes out of the microwave hot doesn’t always stay hot. I know, because I eat bagels in the morning.

Why don’t you bring your face up here and let me punch it? Then you can tell me (if I’m stronger).

But, hey I did everything the right way and earned my spot in this game, nothing was given to me.

Kobe always tried to be a hero. But you know, as the saying goes, a hero ain’t nothing but a sandwich.

Some things you just can’t question. Like you can’t question why two plus two is four. So don’t question it, don’t try to look it up.

I’m just getting better and better. It’s just like a bunch of worker bees protecting the king bee, because I’m not a queen bee. I’m a king bee.

The best quality about Kobe Bryant? You want me to be honest? I don’t know. I’ll tell you why. I open my arms to everybody. But he never stepped forward for the embrace. So I never really got to know him. I don’t know anything about him, and it’s kinda sad.

Anyone can win a slam-dunk contest. The real Superman is dead. He was assassinated by Pat Riley. I’m the Big Cactus now and ready to roll again.

All of my projects are done right because I know the game, and I consider myself a rap expert.

The problem with kids these days is they don’t have enough fun stuff to do. When I was stationed with my family in Germany, youth basketball programs gave me something to strive to do my best at.

I’m going to be on a mission. I’ve handled my personal vendettas and handled them well.

The day I stopped worrying about stats is the day I started winning