They asked me when I was out there, ‘Why do you want to be traded?’ I said me staying here is like divorcing my wife and marrying someone who looks like me. That’s backwards, man.
SHAQUILLE O'NEALIf you take a needle and stick her in the booty and take a needle and stick me in the booty, we’re both going to say ouch.
More Shaquille O'Neal Quotes
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Once you learn how to do something, you don’t lose it. Unless you die.
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As a general, and as a leader of this team, whatever I’ve got to do get my guys going I’ll do it every time. If I have to be the bad guy sometime, I’ll guess I’ll take that. That’s what a leader and a general and a chief of police does.
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Do a lot of stuff. But always do things the right way. Went to the police academy to become a police officer.
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Kobe always tried to be a hero. But you know, as the saying goes, a hero ain’t nothing but a sandwich.
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You guys make the rules up, so a foul is a foul. It doesn’t matter if a guy is bigger and stronger. It’s not my fault I ate my Frosted Flakes when I was little, and you ate Wheaties.
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As a basketball fan, I get sick and tired of people talking about numbers. To me, the world is getting too materialistic.
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I don’t believe in pressure. Pressure is when you don’t know where your next meal is coming from.
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When you’re righteous, you don’t have to tell people that you’re righteous.
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I’m a very quotatious person.
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Being here feels like I’m out of prison. This is the right place, the right time, the right team.
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Anyone can win a slam-dunk contest. The real Superman is dead. He was assassinated by Pat Riley. I’m the Big Cactus now and ready to roll again.
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The problem with kids these days is they don’t have enough fun stuff to do. When I was stationed with my family in Germany, youth basketball programs gave me something to strive to do my best at.
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I urge all children to listen to their mothers and fathers. My mom was helping out some kids and she didn’t want to call me for all of the money; she only wanted to take care of some of the kids.
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The stats win nothing. I’m still sexy. I’m still great.
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I don’t know how it is for you earthlings, but where I’m from, strength is mental.
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I’m the first player in history that doesn’t want to play defense and still gets in foul trouble.
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My secret? See it, and stay focused on it.
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But that is the only thing that slows me down is the system. No one, two or three was big enough to slow me down, only the system. It was the system that slowed me down to make my numbers fall. Not because I am older.
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Stay out of the gentlemen’s clubs. Get a lot of rest. Just have fun and relax and stay focused.
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I’m going to be on a mission. I’ve handled my personal vendettas and handled them well.
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I endorse only products I actually use. Like Wheaties keeps offering me money, but I don’t eat Wheaties, so I can’t do it. Now, if Rice Krispies or Frosted Flakes offered me a deal, I’d take it right away. Apple Jacks, I’d be on the box in a heartbeat. Apple Shaqs. Yeah.
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That was a foul, young lady. You know that was a foul. Don’t ask dumb questions.
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Stats don’t matter. I care about winning, not stats. If I score 0 points and we win I’m happy. If I score 50, 60 points, break the records, and we lose.
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Opinions are like belly buttons; everybody has one. I never knock a man for his opinion.
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Tell Yao Ming, ‘Ching-chong-yang-wah-ah-soh.’
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My wrists are crooked and don’t go all the way back. I’ve been practicing and working on them. You can’t do everything good.
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