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I don’t do talk shows or go on Dr. Phil’s show. He’s a friend of mine, and, no, he doesn’t give me any advice. He doesn’t give solicited advice.

Ron White

There’s not a pill you can take; there’s not a class you can go to. Stupid is forever.
RON WHITE

Class Forever Go Pill Stupid Take
My biggest pet peeve, I guess, is other comedians criticizing Larry the Cable Guy.
RON WHITE

Biggest Cable Comedian Criticise Guy Other Peeve Pet
I started selling out comedy clubs before I got to town with no advertising. I was selling out theaters just on the rumor that I was going to be there.
RON WHITE

Advertise Before Club Comedy Go Rumour Sell Start Theater
I always found that the closer I got to who I really am, on stage, the more they responded to it.
RON WHITE

Always Found Closer More Really Respond Stage
It went from Bob Newhart to Flip Wilson to Bill Cosby to Richard Pryor to George Carlin to Cheech and Chong. I had all these records.
RON WHITE

All Record Country Flip Had People Went
I didn’t get where I am today by worryin’ about how I’d feel tomorrow.
RON WHITE

Feel Get Today Tomorrow Worry
You wanna get the truth out of me, get me hammered.
RON WHITE

Go Hammer Me Out Truth
There have been times when I played more than others, but I’ve been a road comic for a quarter of a century, so I’ve always played golf on the road because you have a lot of time to kill.
RON WHITE

Always Been Century Comic More Other Play Quater Time
If you look at the common denominator of all the comics who have had big success, it’s being true to their nature… that’s what takes a long time to learn.
RON WHITE

Big Comic Common Denominator Long Look Nature Success True
If you become famous and don’t have a live show to back it up, they’re not going to pay you any money.
RON WHITE

Any Back Become Famous Go Money Pay Show
I believe everything creative is somewhat collaborative. If you’re a painter and someone stretches your canvas, it was collaborative on some level.
RON WHITE

Anything Believe Collaborative Creative Partner Some Someone Somewhat Stretch
I believe that if life gives you lemons, you should make lemonade… And try to find somebody whose life has given them vodka, and have a party.
RON WHITE

Believe Lemon Life Party Somebody Try
There are two kinds of comics; there are the ones who build bridges, and then there are the people who walk across the bridges as though they built them. The bridge builders are few and far between.
RON WHITE

Across Bridge Build Comic Kinda One People Through Two Walk
I don’t watch Comedy Central. I don’t enjoy it.
RON WHITE

Central Comedy Enjoy Watch
Mother, she likes the blue material just fine.
RON WHITE

Blue Fine Just Like Material Mother
I was a little one-trick pony. I do what I’ve always done. That’s really where my best stuff comes from. I don’t know how it happens. It just happens.
RON WHITE

Always Best Done Happen Little One Pony Stuff Trick

I don’t do talk shows or go on Dr. Phil’s show. He’s a friend of mine, and, no, he doesn’t give me any advice. He doesn’t give solicited advice.

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I don’t do talk shows or go on Dr. Phil’s show. He’s a friend of mine, and, no, he doesn’t give me any advice. He doesn’t give solicited advice.

Related Topics

Popular Authors

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