There are two things at which most men are grieved: when their faults are exposed, and when their virtues are concealed.
NORM MACDONALDThere are two indiscretions that generally distinguish fools: a readiness to report whatever they hear, and a practice of communicating with secrecy what is commonly understood.
More Norm MacDonald Quotes
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Liberty, like health, appears most precious when lost.
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He that searches for praise will often find contempt.
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Comedy is surprises, so if you’re intending to make somebody laugh and they don’t laugh, that’s funny.
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All my life’s about is cracking up people and them cracking me up and trying not to think about dying. That doesn’t cost very much money.
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The joy a person is usually seen to express at the conversion of another to his opinion is seldom more than the impulse of egotistical satisfaction at being considered worthy of didactic imitation.
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Many frequently change their principles, but seldom their practices.
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I can’t be naturalistic enough to make it sound real. So instead, I just wander around aimlessly knowing that I’ll be funny enough with stream of consciousness until I get to the actual explosively funny part.
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You can’t love your team without hating another team.
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Hypocrisy is the outward acknowledgment of inward shame.
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I generally have a real strong idea or a strong punchline, and I just try to get to it by rambling around, as I don’t like to memorize words.
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We often suffer more from our fears, than from the dangers of our situation.
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During misfortunes, nothing aggravates our condition more, than to be esteemed deserving of them.
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Reason is always weak where prejudice is strong.
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Though you may be last to discover your follies, be always first to correct them.
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Enjoyment inflames love in some men, and extinguishes it in others: the wind that assists large vessels, upsets small ones.
NORM MACDONALD






