The reason we have few friends in adversity, is, because we have no true ones in prosperity.
NORM MACDONALDYou know, with Hitler, the more I learn about that guy, the more I don’t care for him.
More Norm MacDonald Quotes
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If you desire praise or esteem, endeavor to merit it.
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With the ambitious, the failure of one expedient is the suggestion of another; but with the irresolute, defeat usually occasions abandonment of purpose.
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You can’t love your team without hating another team.
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Instead of loving your enemies, have no enemies to love.
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In love, we are best pleased when we please others.
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I can’t be naturalistic enough to make it sound real. So instead, I just wander around aimlessly knowing that I’ll be funny enough with stream of consciousness until I get to the actual explosively funny part.
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He that searches for praise will often find contempt.
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Flattery succeeds best on minds previously occupied by conceit.
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It is necessary to be tolerant, in order to be tolerated.
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Comedy is surprises, so if you’re intending to make somebody laugh and they don’t laugh, that’s funny.
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Violent people usually express their love of a thing by their hatred of its opposite.
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I think clever people think that poor people are stupid.
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The beginning of wisdom is the knowledge of folly.
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I got my computer. The great thing about the computer is that you only need enough money to buy a computer and some food, and you’re all right. I don’t have to go to premières.
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Liberty, like health, appears most precious when lost.
NORM MACDONALD






