This would have been a great game to watch if we didn’t have any money on it.
NORM MACDONALDThe first principle of solid wisdom is discretion, without it all the erudition of life is merely bagatelle.
More Norm MacDonald Quotes
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Though you may be last to discover your follies, be always first to correct them.
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There are two things which a man should scrupulously avoid: giving advice that he would not follow, and asking advice when he is determined to pursue his own opinion.
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I think clever people think that poor people are stupid.
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There are two indiscretions that generally distinguish fools: a readiness to report whatever they hear, and a practice of communicating with secrecy what is commonly understood.
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Chastity is oftener owing to diffidence and shame, than to fortitude of reason or virtue.
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I’m thankful for women. I think women are more intelligent than men. Also, without women, there would be no cookies.
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Ever see this? It’s a homeless guy but he’s got a dog… The dog’s really thrilled with this idea. The dog’s going, Hey pal, I can do this by myself pretty well. The longest walk in the world you got me on here.
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It is often better to be restricted to necessity than unconfined in the measure of our desires: prosperity destroys more individuals than adversity ruins.
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You know, with Hitler, the more I learn about that guy, the more I don’t care for him.
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Ignorance is better than knowledge misapplied.
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I got my computer. The great thing about the computer is that you only need enough money to buy a computer and some food, and you’re all right. I don’t have to go to premières.
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I don’t really like politics that much. And I like the order and simplicity of sports. They have an ending. You can argue with your friends about it, but in the end you still like sports. I almost love the fantasy world of sports more than the real world.
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In love, we are best pleased when we please others.
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When I hear a guy lost a battle to cancer, that really did bother me, that that’s a term. It implies that he failed and that somebody else that defeated cancer is heroic and courageous.
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He that searches for praise will often find contempt.
NORM MACDONALD