All my life’s about is cracking up people and them cracking me up and trying not to think about dying. That doesn’t cost very much money.
NORM MACDONALDIn love, we are best pleased when we please others.
More Norm MacDonald Quotes
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Few are more unhappy than those who have great ambition, but little energy to urge it into activity.
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Instead of loving your enemies, have no enemies to love.
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As evacuation eases the body, so occasional ejectment of passion seems to appease the agonies of the soul, and dispose to tranquility the agitations of the heart.
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Note to self: no matter how bad life gets, there’s always beer.
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A suspicious person is the rival of him that deceives, both seem to practice a knowledge of cunning device, and equable sense of disengenuous merit.
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Though you may be last to discover your follies, be always first to correct them.
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You know, with Hitler, the more I learn about that guy, the more I don’t care for him.
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He that searches for praise will often find contempt.
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Many frequently change their principles, but seldom their practices.
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Some people are so much afraid of being deceived, that they never venture to trust; like misers, their avarice destroys their gain.
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There are two indiscretions that generally distinguish fools: a readiness to report whatever they hear, and a practice of communicating with secrecy what is commonly understood.
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All that weak people learn from disappointment, is less confidence in future enterprise.
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Reason is always weak where prejudice is strong.
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Scientists believe they may have discovered a primitive form of life on Jupiter’s moon Europa. That primitive form of life? You guessed it, Frank Stallone.
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In math, you could get 100 percent. It was very fair. That’s what I liked about math. You could figure it out, and the teacher couldn’t have a stupid opinion about it.
NORM MACDONALD