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If I had known what it would be like to have it all – I might have been willing to settle for less.

Lily Tomlin

Don’t be afraid of missing opportunities. Behind every failure is an opportunity somebody wishes they had missed.
LILY TOMLIN

Afraid Failure Inspirational Missing Opportunity
If evolution was worth its salt, it should’ve evolved something better than ‘survival of the fittest.’ I think a better idea would be ‘survival of the wittiest.’ At least, that way, creatures that didn’t survive could’ve died laughing.
LILY TOMLIN

Better Creature Death Evolution Laughter Survive Worth
The trouble with the rat race is that even if you win, you’re still a rat.
LILY TOMLIN

Deep Race Trouble Win Yourself
When I’ve had a meltdown, people will say to me, “Well, you failed to keep your sense of humor.”
LILY TOMLIN

Failure Humor Myself People Talk Yourself
Did you know, throughout the cosmos they found intelligent life forms that play to play? We are the only ones that play to win. Explains why we have more than our share of losers.
LILY TOMLIN

Form Intelligence Life Lose Play Share Space Win
I guess if people couldn’t profit from war I don’t think there would be war.
LILY TOMLIN

Myself People Profit Thinking War
After all, in private, we’re all misfits.
LILY TOMLIN

One Liner Privacy
What I appreciate is acknowledging to the audience that I think they have brains.
LILY TOMLIN

Audience Brain Knowledge Myself Praise Thinking
I can handle reality in small doses, but as a lifestyle, it’s much too confining.
LILY TOMLIN

Life Myself Reality Small Style
Success is a ladder that cannot be climbed with your hands in your pocket – The road to success is always under construction.
LILY TOMLIN

Construction Hands Ladder Road Success
If you can’t be direct, why be?
LILY TOMLIN

Direct Yourself
There will be sex after death, we just won’t be able to feel it.
LILY TOMLIN

Death Feeling Sex
No matter how cynical you become, it’s never enough to keep up.
LILY TOMLIN

Change Enough Myself Transformation
Growing up in Michigan was fine, until I realized where I was.
LILY TOMLIN

Born Growth Myself Place
Wouldn’t it be great if we all grew up to be what we wanted to be? The world would be full of nurses, firemen, and ballerinas.
LILY TOMLIN

Greatness Growth World
Infinity is just time on an ego trip.
LILY TOMLIN

Ego Infinity One Liner Time Trip

If I had known what it would be like to have it all – I might have been willing to settle for less.

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If I had known what it would be like to have it all – I might have been willing to settle for less.

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