Instead of working for the survival of the fittest, we should be working for the survival of the wittiest – then we can all die laughing.
LILY TOMLINEvery day I read the newspapers, and no matter how cynical I get, it’s imposssible to keep up.
More Lily Tomlin Quotes
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The best mind-altering drug is the truth.
LILY TOMLIN -
I think life is perverse. It can be beautiful, but it won’t.
LILY TOMLIN -
I always wanted to be somebody, but now I realize I should have been more specific.
LILY TOMLIN -
You are what you think, geez, that’s frightening.
LILY TOMLIN -
We have reason to believe that man first walked upright to free his hands for masturbation.
LILY TOMLIN -
After all, in private, we’re all misfits.
LILY TOMLIN -
Ninety eight percent of the adults in this country are decent, hardworking, honest Americans. It’s the other lousy two percent that get all the publicity. But then, we elected them.
LILY TOMLIN -
If you have a dog or a cat, you know how developed they can be. How sensitive, how aware. They suffer. We all do.
LILY TOMLIN -
Infinity is just time on an ego trip.
LILY TOMLIN -
To me, “sexual freedom” means freedom from having to have sex.
LILY TOMLIN -
The road to success is always under construction.
LILY TOMLIN -
If truth is beauty, how come no one has their hair done in the library?
LILY TOMLIN -
No matter how cynical you become, it’s never enough to keep up.
LILY TOMLIN -
I guess if people couldn’t profit from war I don’t think there would be war.
LILY TOMLIN -
Man invented language to satisfy his deep need to complain.
LILY TOMLIN