Do not, on a rainy day, ask your child what he feels like doing, because I assure you that what he feels like doing, you won’t feel like watching.
FRAN LEBOWITZIf you are of the opinion that the contemplation of suicide is sufficient evidence of a poetic nature, do not forget that actions speak louder than words.
More Fran Lebowitz Quotes
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In the Soviet Union, capitalism triumphed over communism. In this country, capitalism triumphed over democracy.
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Scientists – the crowd that for dash and style make the general public look like the Bloomsbury set.
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I’ve done the calculation and your chances of winning the lottery are identical whether you play or not.
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The conversational overachiever is someone whose grasp exceeds his reach. This is possible but not attractive.
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All God’s children are not beautiful. Most of God’s children are, in fact, barely presentable.
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Designer clothes worn by children are like snowsuits worn by adults. Few can carry it off successfully.
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The opposite of talking isn’t listening. The opposite of talking is waiting.
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Ask your child what he wants for dinner only if he’s buying.
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Very few people possess true artistic ability. It is therefore both unseemly and unproductive to irritate the situation by making an effort.
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In real life, I assure you, there is no such thing as algebra.
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If you are a dog and your owner suggests that you wear a sweater suggest that he wear a tail.
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Nature is by and large to be found out of doors, a location where, it cannot be argued, there are never enough comfortable chairs.
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I figure you have the same chance of winning the lottery whether you play or not.
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As a teenager you are at the last stage in your life when you will be happy to hear that the phone is for you.
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Nothing succeeds like address.
FRAN LEBOWITZ