He who laughs lasts.
ERMA BOMBECKFor years, my husband and I have advocated separate vacations. But the kids keep finding us.
More Erma Bombeck Quotes
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Cats invented self-esteem.
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I am not a glutton – I am an explorer of food.
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How come anything you buy will go on sale next week?
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Seize the moment. Remember all those women on the ‘Titanic’ who waved off the dessert cart.
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I’ve exercised with women so thin that buzzards followed them to their cars.
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A grandmother pretends she doesn’t know who you are on Halloween.
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Once you see the drivers in Indonesia you understand why religion plays such a part in their lives.
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It seemed rather incongruous that in a society of super sophisticated communication, we often suffer from a shortage of listeners.
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Some emotions don’t make a lot of noise. It’s hard to hear pride. Caring is real faint – like a heartbeat. And pure love – why, some days it’s so quiet, you don’t even know it’s there.
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I worry about scientists discovering that lettuce has been fattening all along.
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Like religion, politics, and family planning, cereal is not a topic to be brought up in public. It’s too controversial.
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All of us have moments in our lives that test our courage. Taking children into a house with a white carpet is one of them.
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A grandparent is the only baby-sitter who doesn’t charge more after midnight – or anything before midnight.
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Good kids are like sunsets. We take them for granted. Every evening they disappear. Most parents never imagine how hard they try to please us, and how miserable they feel when they think they have failed.
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Thanksgiving dinners take eighteen hours to prepare. They are consumed in twelve minutes. Half-times take twelve minutes. This is not coincidence.
ERMA BOMBECK