He who laughs lasts.
ERMA BOMBECKIt is not until you become a mother that your judgment slowly turns to compassion and understanding.
More Erma Bombeck Quotes
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Success is outliving your failures.
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Don’t confuse fame with success. Madonna is one; Helen Keller is the other.
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All of us have moments in our lives that test our courage. Taking children into a house with a white carpet is one of them.
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When my kids become wild and unruly, I use a nice, safe playpen. When they’re finished, I climb out.
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The hippopotamus is a vegetarian and looks like a wall. Lions who eat only red meat are sleek and slim. Are nutritionists on the wrong track?
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Onion rings in the car cushions do not improve with time.
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I’ve exercised with women so thin that buzzards followed them to their cars.
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There is a thin line that separates laughter and pain, comedy and tragedy, humor and hurt.
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People usually survive their illnesses, but the paper work eventually does them in. Filing a claim for insurance is terminal.
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Good kids are like sunsets. We take them for granted. Every evening they disappear. Most parents never imagine how hard they try to please us, and how miserable they feel when they think they have failed.
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Volunteers are the only human beings on the face of the earth who reflect this nation’s compassion, unselfish caring, patience, and just plain love for one another.
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Housework is a treadmill from futility to oblivion with stop-offs at tedium and counter productivity.
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Never have more children than you have car windows.
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Cats invented self-esteem.
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It is not until you become a mother that your judgment slowly turns to compassion and understanding.
ERMA BOMBECK