Children make your life important.
ERMA BOMBECKSome emotions don’t make a lot of noise. It’s hard to hear pride. Caring is real faint – like a heartbeat. And pure love – why, some days it’s so quiet, you don’t even know it’s there.
More Erma Bombeck Quotes
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When I stand before God at the end of my life, I would hope that I would not have a single bit of talent left, and could say, ‘I used everything you gave me’.
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Sometimes I can’t figure designers out. It’s as if they flunked human anatomy.
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Grandparenthood is one of life’s rewards for surviving your own children.
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When you’re lecturing teenagers and they begin to hum and leave the room, you can sense there is hostility.
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Cats invented self-esteem.
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I got to thinking one day about all those women on the Titanic who passed up dessert at dinner that fateful night.
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Maybe age is kinder to us than we think. With my bad eyes, I can’t see how bad I look, and with my rotten memory, I have a good excuse for getting out of a lot of stuff.
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A grandparent will help you with your buttons, your zippers, and your shoelaces and not be in any hurry for you to grow up.
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Giving birth is little more than a set of muscular contractions granting passage of a child. Then the mother is born.
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Time. It hangs heavy for the bored, eludes the busy, flies by the for young, and runs out for the aged.
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Did you ever notice that the first piece of luggage on the carousel never belongs to anyone?
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I was trampled to death by a man who believed his luggage would be the first piece off. If he were an experienced traveler, he would know that the first piece of luggage belongs to no one. It’s just a dummy suitcase to give everyone hope.
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He who laughs lasts.
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There is a thin line that separates laughter and pain, comedy and tragedy, humor and hurt.
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The hippopotamus is a vegetarian and looks like a wall. Lions who eat only red meat are sleek and slim. Are nutritionists on the wrong track?
ERMA BOMBECK







