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Erma Bombeck Quote - Children make your life important.

Children make your life important.

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Onion rings in the car cushions do not improve with time.
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I read one psychologist’s theory that said, “Never strike a child in your anger.” When could I strike him? When he is kissing me on my birthday? When he’s recuperating from measles? Do I slap the Bible out of his hand on Sunday?
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If a man watches three football games in a row, he should be declared legally dead.
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It takes a lot of courage to show your dreams to someone else.
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As a child, my number one best friend was the librarian in my grade school. I actually believed all those books belonged to her.
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Every puppy should have a boy.
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Seize the moment. Remember all those women on the ‘Titanic’ who waved off the dessert cart.
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If you can’t make it better, you can laugh at it.
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Time. It hangs heavy for the bored, eludes the busy, flies by the for young, and runs out for the aged.
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Housework is a treadmill from futility to oblivion with stop-offs at tedium and counter productivity.
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He who laughs lasts.
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Children make your life important.
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A grandmother pretends she doesn’t know who you are on Halloween.
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My theory on housework is, if the item doesn’t multiply, smell, catch fire, or block the refrigerator door, let it be. No one else cares. Why should you?
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Giving birth is little more than a set of muscular contractions granting passage of a child. Then the mother is born.
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A member of the committee slapped a name tag over my left bosom. “What shall we name the other one?” I smiled. She was not amused.
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